


If You Had To Choose

by spursaustralia



Category: Naruto
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Time Travel, mild PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-16
Updated: 2019-02-07
Packaged: 2019-06-11 09:17:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15312336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spursaustralia/pseuds/spursaustralia
Summary: Kakashi finds himself back in the past after dying (again). Struggling to adjust and armed with knowledge of the future, Kakashi must choose between prioritising personal gain or the gain for those around him, and determining whether or not people can truly change.





	1. Morning Light

**Author's Note:**

> I know it's been done before, but I love reading Kakashi time-travel stories so much that I decided I would write one myself. This is slightly AU, as in this story Obito has not decided to be good again after the fight with Kakashi during the war (and obviously Kakashi does not die in canon). This chapter is a bit wordy as I'm introducing the concept and Kakashi's mind-frame for the story, so apologies.
> 
> I am not the greatest writer, so feel free to provide constructive criticism if you read something that bothers you and I will take it on board.

Kakashi yawned, wiping his eyes and taking a moment to stare up at the early light shining through the branches above him, his back aching slightly from sleeping on the hard ground. He breathed deeply and closed his eyes, embracing the rare quiet moment in what had been a stressful and painful few months. _God, I hate war_ , he thought bitterly, _I’d forgotten how much everything hurts-_

Kakashi froze.

Slowly moving into a sitting position, he carefully reached and felt the uncovered left eye he had unconsciously rubbed. His hitai-ate was not in its familiar slant and yet his vision was normal, indicating that it was no longer heightened by the sharingan. Kakashi’s breath caught in his throat and he immediately flaired his chakra, searching for possible enemies and finding nothing. Just how long had he been unconscious?

“Kai!” Kakashi subdued the rising panic as neither the thick forest nor his normal vision disappeared. When it became clear that he was not under any genjutsu, Kakashi began frantically rubbing his eyes again, his skin protesting under the pressure as he somewhat foolishly attempted to reactivate the kekkei genkai. _It’s not actually my kekkai genkai though_ , Kakashi rationalised, his eyes beginning to water and the skin around his eyes turning an angry red. _Maybe it has something to do with Obito_ -

Obito.

Kakashi lurched forward onto his hands and knees as a wave of painful memories hit him. Blood. Rage. Betrayal. Obito.

_He… he killed me._

The boy he had spent years mourning and honouring his memory, his friend, had killed him. Breathing heavily, his arms shaking as they struggled to hold his weight, Kakashi reached for his eye again. _What’s going on? I died… I’m sure of it. I’d know too, since I’ve died before_ , Kakashi paused. … _Can I die?_ Shaking his head, eyes still burning from the manic rubbing, Kakashi breathed deeply before moving back into a sitting position and assessing his surroundings. He needed to regather some level of sanity; his body had not reacted like this to an undesirable situation in a long time.

He appeared to be on the outskirts of a training ground, although he did not immediately recognise which one. That in itself was a worrying sign. _It does_ look _like Konoha_ , Kakashi frowned, observing the forest. Something in the back of his mind whispered Infinite Tsukuyomi, the grand plan of Obito and Madara Uchiha, but the silver-haired shinobi dismissed it almost immediately. He had died, no doubt whatsoever. Despite his conviction, a small part of him wondered if he would even be able to recognise if he were in fact caught in that moon bullshit. It was the goal of a madman, but who's to say that it wouldn't be effective? Sighing, Kakashi stretched out his limbs and stood with mild difficulty, noticing his attire for the first time.

Kakashi frowned in confusion at the presence of arm guards and lack of jounin vest, _What-_

“Ah, there you are Kakashi!”

Kakashi whirled around and swore he felt his heart stop. _KaikaikaiKAIKAIKAI_ , he thought frantically, unable to move as the familiar blond jounin made his way towards him from the other side of the training ground. Namikaze Minato was exactly how Kakashi remembered him, complete with the carefree smile and bright blue eyes.

Minato continued, briefly oblivious to Kakashi’s inner panic, “We were starting to get worried, Obito was sure something terrible had happened for you to be later than him.” Minato laughed good-naturedly but Kakashi couldn’t help but flinch at the mention of the Uchiha, unable to get that deranged smile and wide eyes out of his mind. “Have you been training by yourself?”

Kakashi didn’t respond. Or rather, he couldn’t. His throat had constricted and he could scarcely breathe let alone talk because this was _so real_ and his sensei was _right there_. He let out a choking noise that sounded too much like a sob for his liking, causing Minato to pause and properly take in his student. Kakashi’s wide eyes were red and aggravated, his hair dishevelled, his hitai-ate loose, and his clothes covered in dirt and grime.

“Kakashi…?” Minato started gently, moving closer to him, “Is everything alright?”

Those kind eyes that exuded so much concern and care proved too much for Kakashi, who not for the first (or second) time today panicked and did the first thing that came to mind. He shunshined away. Not knowing where he was or where he was going, Kakashi came to a stop in another clearing, his heart racing. Despite the extreme speed in which he left Minato, Kakashi knew that his old sensei could easily catch him if he wanted to.

_I seriously need to pull myself together_ , Kakashi thought, groaning. He reached and felt his left eye again, running his fingers over the skin that had been scarred for so long but was now smooth. This was not ideal. _Or is it?_ A part of him whispered, the part of his mind that insisted on replaying those painful moments of his past over and over until it was all he could see when he closed his eyes. He knew those memories would haunt him forever, and he had always wished that he could go back and protect those that meant the most to him. He had died, Kakashi was certain of that, but had some divine power given him a second chance? When he had absolutely nothing to deserve it?

He wanted this to be time travel, but he was hesitant to be too hopeful. _It could only otherwise be an incredibly elaborate genjutsu_ , Kakashi looked around the new clearing, recognising it as training ground three, _but no one is this good_. Aside from whatever Madara was planning to do with the moon, the greatest genjutsu user he had known was Uchiha Itachi, but he had died (again; poor Itachi) before the fight with Obito, and Kakashi was pretty sure that not even Itachi could pull this off. This was the real deal, he had been given a second chance.

Just to make sure, Kakashi removed a glove and swung his fist as the nearest tree, his lips curling slightly at the familiar sting as his knuckles began to bleed. It was real, alright.

Now that he had some form of his bearings back, Kakashi supposed he should go home and get his shit together before Minato stated looking for him again, as the blond was clearly giving him some time to collect himself. _He probably thinks I’ve finally lost it,_ Kakashi sighed and began the familiar trek back to the village from training ground three. Considering that it appeared he was in the past (or at least some version of it) before the awful Kannabi Bridge mission due to the mention of Obito, Kakashi made his way to his old apartment, taking as many backstreets as possible in order to avoid seeing anyone he knew. He would have to face them eventually, he knew that, but he wanted to be at least mildly prepared before possibly seeing familiar faces like Asuma, Jiraiya and Shikaku. Not to mention the girl he killed and the boy who killed him. _Fuck_. Considering the way he just bolted upon seeing Minato, maybe some meditation was in order.

_But first_ , Kakashi thought as he disabled multiple traps and entered his rather plain apartment, _I need to figure out how long I have before everything turns to shit_. He made a beeline for the bathroom mirror and even though he knew what would greet him, he couldn’t help sucking in a sharp breath at the sight of his reflection.

He was young. Very young. His skin was clear and smooth and his eyes brighter than they had been in a long time, although still mildly irritated from his early morning panic attack. Pulling down his mask, he reached behind his neck and felt for a small but deep scar he had received on a mission to Suna once upon a time; a reminder of how the smallest distraction (his annoyance at Obito) could cost him. His fingers brushed over the scar, though it was more of a healing cut at this point, and Kakashi deduced that he must be at least twelve years old.

Feeling a sudden wave of exhaustion, he deliberated whether it was acceptable to sleep when it had only been daylight for barely two hours. It appeared that dying did not result in feeling well-rested. Minato would come looking for him eventually, he was too much like a worried parent not to, and Kakashi supposed that his twelve year old self actually choosing to be in bed rather than train would support any excuses of sickness to explain his earlier behaviour.

Kakashi dragged himself to his bedroom and buried himself in the covers, his mind not reflecting his body’s weariness as it continued to work into overdrive. He was thirteen when he made jounin and led the mission from hell, he needed to find out how much more time he had… To what? _Save_ Obito, when he knew what he could become? Who was he to say that a different future event wouldn’t trigger the same results? Maybe this was just who Obito was; idealistic and vengeful.

Groaning lightly into his pillow, Kakashi determined that such thoughts could wait until he didn’t feel like he had just died.


	2. A Peaceful Lunch

Kakashi’s dreams were haunted by a man with a horrifically scarred face, demonic smile, and eyes that reflected such ferocity and hatred it made his skin crawl. Uchiha Obito was a monster. Kakashi startled awake, breathing heavily and clutching his left eye as it screamed in pain. Heart beating out of his chest, he blinked and assessed his surroundings. Still no sharingan, but his eye was blurry and aching like someone had tried to gouge it out with a kunai. Kakashi looked down at his hand as he removed it from his eye and sighed when he saw the patches of blood. _Not good._

Making his way back to the bathroom mirror, Kakashi assessed the damage done to his face. He must have been clawing at his left eye in his sleep; it was incredibly inflamed with angry red marks and cuts surrounding the eyelids. This was going to be difficult to explain. As he began washing his face and removing the drying blood, his sharp hearing caught the sound of his front door being opened. _Shit… should have reactivated the traps_. Reaching for a kunai and yanking his hitai-ate down over his still stinging eye, Kakashi crouched into a defensive position and crept towards the chakra signature in the living room.

He dropped the kunai immediately when he was met with the concerned face of his sensei, the weapon clattering on the floor.

“Oh… sorry Kakashi,” Minato began sheepishly, “I suppose I should have knocked.”

Kakashi was more annoyed with himself; he should have recognised his sensei’s chakra signature as a non-threat almost immediately. It had been a long time, but there wasn’t a more calming and kind presence than Minato (aside from when he was on the battlefield fighting enemy shinobi).

“It’s no problem, s-sensei,” Kakashi croaked, his voice hoarse and grating on his throat. He coughed quickly and realised that he had not spoken a word since dying and arriving in the past. “I was, ah, sleeping. You caught me off guard.”

Minato eyed him wordlessly. The silence stretched on and Kakashi held himself still, determined not to fidget under the penetrating gaze of the man. He swore that Minato could tell just by looking at him that he was actually a thirty year old man in the body of a twelve year old. He was not Hokage yet, obvious due to the lack of signature cloak, but there was an air around the blond that was no-nonsense and intimidating. He was unamused.

“Kakashi. Your mask.”

Kakashi blinked. After his efforts to find the scar earlier, he must have forgotten to pull his mask back up over his face. He never forgot. _I am losing my damn mind,_ Kakashi groaned internally as he quickly pulled his mask up over his nose, _at this rate Minato will send me to Torture and Interrogation to get a psych evaluation_.

“Must have been a good dream then,” Kakashi joked with a strained cheerfulness that he knew Minato saw straight through.

Minato paused, “…Right. Is everything okay, Kakashi? This morning… you looked… “ He struggled to find the words, and Kakashi kept his face carefully blank. “Have you been sleeping this whole time? And did something happen to your eye?”

Kakashi shrugged nonchalantly, keeping his tone casual, “I haven’t been feeling well, I decided to rest for a while.”

“You came straight here after I saw you?” The blond jounin continued to question, his eyes concerned but with a hint of wariness. Kakashi wondered what conclusions he was drawing; probably nothing good.

“Yes.”

“You do realise that you have been sleeping for seven hours?” _Seven hours-_ “I’m taking you to the hospital.”

Kakashi blanched, the hospital was quite possibly his least favourite place ever. “What? No, sensei I’m fine, honestly,” he protested wildly as Minato crossed his arms. “I just needed to sleep it off, I’m fine now. Really. You don’t need to worry.”

“Alright, no hospital,” Minato agreed, and moved to sit on the old couch in the living room. “But then you need to tell me what’s wrong, starting with that.” Minato pointed at the eye covered by the titled hitai-ate. Alright, time to create a believable story; something he should have been working on during those _seven_ hours of freedom.

“Well,” Kakashi began, trying to look as casual as possible as he continued to stand, “It started a few days ago-“

“What started?” Minato interrupted, and Kakashi resisted the urge to roll his eyes. It was going to be like that, was it? _I don’t remember sensei ever being this pushy,_ Kakashi pondered, he must have been acting particularly strange for Minato to be this worried.

“This pain in my eyes- not extreme, hospital worthy pain though,” Kakashi amended quickly and Minato raised an amused eyebrow. “Just a throbbing kind of pain, and in my left eye more than my right. I think I was scratching it in my sleep.” There, that was pretty close to the truth, just without the fact that he had his evil ex-teammates transplanted eye for the past however many years.

Minato appeared to reluctantly believe his story, as Kakashi could see his jaw relax slightly and the tension release from his eyebrows.

“May I see it?” He asked gently, and once again Kakashi had to look away from those kind blue eyes, his heart aching.

“It’s not much to look at,” Kakashi began, but walked slowly towards Minato and reached up to his hitai-ate anyway; his sensei wouldn’t take no for an answer in this mood. Sitting next to him and lifting up the headband, he watched as Minato inspected his eye, clearly refraining from reacting in order to not offend his young former apprentice. Kakashi had forgotten how superficial his younger self was at this age.

“It looks pretty scratched alright,” Minato concluded and smiled reassuringly at his student, “But it should heal up soon. Maybe you can ask Rin to have a look at it, if you don’t want to go to the hospital.”

_No thanks_ , Kakashi suppressed a shudder and pulled the hitai-ate back down over his eye. He would rather she didn’t look at him at all. How could he possibly face her when his last memory of his compassionate teammate was his hand through her heart? Minato seemed to sense his dark mood by the way his eyebrows knitted together, but tapped his hand anyway.

“And what about this?” He gestured to Kakashi’s bloody knuckles.

Oh, he had forgotten about that too, “I, er, punched a tree. Without using chakra.”

Minato blinked, “…You punched a tree? Why?”

“I was mad.”

“At who?”

“My eye,” Kakashi shrugged and suppressed a smile at his sensei’s bewildered expression, it reminded him so vividly of Naruto. Recognising that Minato was finally in a relatively relaxed mood and he himself no longer felt like he would spontaneously combust when the blond merely looked at him, Kakashi decided to take the opportunity to properly interact with his sensei again. “How was training without me, by the way?”

“It was strange,” Minato admitted, “It’s been a long time since I’ve trained without you there. Obito claimed that he enjoyed it as he believes you command too much of the attention,” Minato laughed but Kakashi couldn’t find it within himself to even pretend to smile. Something was nagging at the edge of his mind, calling for him to remember an important memory or connect the dots, but it wouldn’t come to him. He looked up to see Minato watching him carefully. So much for a casual conversation, it lasted all of about ten seconds. “Say Kakashi, you must be hungry right? Why don’t you come out and have a late lunch with me?” _‘Why don’t you come spend more time with me so I can continue to watch you like a hawk?’_ Kakashi grumbled internally, struggling to keep his disposition light and uncaring.

“Maa, I was planning on just relaxing here really-“

“You have been sleeping for seven hours,” Minato deadpanned. “You’ve done plenty of relaxing.”

Kakashi was not enjoying this new, pushy Minato. He knew he’d have to explore his past life at some point, but having _Minato_ watch him do so was less than ideal. He already knew something was up, that much was clear, but not even his legend of a sensei would guess time travel. Whatever conclusions he had drawn from his student’s slightly bizarre behaviour, Kakashi knew he would need to quell some of the blond jounin’s worries if he was going to have any peace.

He sighed in resignation, “Fine.”

Minato grinned in response.

* * *

Surprising absolutely no-one, things were not ‘fine’; although they did begin that way. Just seeing a bustling and alive Konoha rather than one that was still recovering from the Pein attack was enough to brighten Kakashi’s mood as he followed a step behind Minato through the main street. The silver-haired shinobi avoided the curious gazes from passers-by and instead focused on his sensei, whose cheerful disposition calmed his growing nerves. _If I see Obito… I honestly don’t know what I’ll do_ , Kakashi hoped like anything that the boy was far, far away from wherever they were going.

“Sensei,” Kakashi queried, and the blond glanced down at him. _Man it sucks being short again_. “Where are we going?”

Minato looked sheepish. “Ah, well I know it’s not the healthiest option, so please forgive me, but I’ve been looking forward to some ramen all day. I was hoping we could go to Ichiraku’s.”

Kakashi shrugged in response, but couldn’t help frowning. Did he not pay enough attention when he was young? He couldn’t remember Minato ever being that big on ramen, in fact, he was pretty sure that was a favourite of-

Long, flowing red hair caught his eye as he spotted a familiar figure sitting on a stool under the Ichiraku Ramen sign. He gave his sensei a look and the blond blinked innocently in response. Seeing Uzumaki Kushina again would be difficult for him, but it could have been a lot worse. Accepting his fate, he followed Minato and internally steeled himself for the interaction. He could not remember if Minato and Kushina were in a relationship at this point, but he supposed it didn’t matter with the way the blond jounin was looking at her.

“Ah, Kushina!” Minato called cheerfully, a light blush on his cheeks. “I didn’t realise you’d be here, do you mind if Kakashi and I join you?” _You are fooling no-one, sensei_ , Kakashi resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

Kushina smiled and nodded, patting the stool next to her, her mouth chewing the ramen furiously. The pair sat down and Kakashi was hit with a wave of nostalgia as he remembered sitting with another blond and a pink haired girl, as they not so subtly tried to sneak a glance at what was hidden behind his mask. He couldn't help letting out a small smile at the memory, knowing that his mask would likely hide the action.

“It’s been a while, Kakashi,” the red-head managed between mouthfuls, “How’s things?”

“Alright, I suppose,” Kakashi responded, ordering ramen of his own, “Although my greatest secret was recently exposed, so maybe not so good.” He sighed forlornly.

Kushina paused mid-bite, she shared a confused look with Minato who merely shrugged in response, looking curiously at Kakashi. “Oh? Can I know? Or will that be spoiling the secret even more…” She winked at Kakashi.

“I suppose you can know… but you must swear to secrecy, along with Minato-sensei,” the boy said seriously. Minato looked positively bewildered, but Kushina was grinning in excitement, her ramen momentarily forgotten. Kakashi leaned in, the two adults mirroring his actions, “This morning… sensei saw me without my mask.”

Kushina laughed loudly and Minato visibly sagged. “Kakashi, that was this afternoon.” Kakashi waved his sensei off, muttering ‘details’.

“Aw man, lucky you,” Kushina nudged Minato good-naturedly, who let out a smile in response. Seeing them interact was once again nagging at something in his mind and Kakashi frowned as he tried to reach it, blocking out the noise around him. Whatever it was that was demanding his attention, it related to the two sitting next to him, he was sure of that. _Minato… Kushina… Naruto… Obito?_ He shook himself violently out of his thoughts when he remembered that he was not alone, the two adults looking at him with a mixture of expectation and concern.

“Er, sorry… Could you repeat that?” Kakashi asked breathlessly, his heart hammering in his chest.

“…I said why do you need me to keep the secret, when I wasn’t the one who saw your face?” Kushina paused, hesitating before continuing, “I-I know it’s not my place to ask, but are you okay, Kakashi?”

No, he was not okay, but it would be a lot easier if people would give him a little peace. He avoided his sensei’s concerned eyes as he responded, “I’m just a little under the weather, and I assumed he would tell you, you know… considering your involvement.”

The pair blushed heavily and Kakashi smiled innocently. He was too much of a grumpy kid previously at this age to tease his sensei; he would not miss his chance this time around.

“Was I wrong?” Kakashi continued cheerfully, looking down and realising that he had not even touched his ramen. Discreetly pulling down his mask, he scoffed down as much as he could before replacing his mask and standing. Minto and Kushina were both watching him curiously. “Anyway, I will leave you guys to it. I’ll go and make up for the missed training, thank you for lunch sensei, it was nice to see you again, Kushina.” He bowed respectfully to both of them, holding back every instinct to sprint away.

“W-wait, Kakashi!” Minato spluttered, rising from his stool.

Honestly. _Honestly._

“Yes, sensei?” The silver-haired boy strained. He was happy to see Minato again, ecstatic really, but he had never had anyone _ever_ constantly inquiring about him and what he was doing and what he was _feeling_. Not his father, not Jiraiya, and previously not Minato. It was exhausting.

Minato seemed to sense this frustration to an extent, and hesitated before answering, “Just go easy, okay? Since you haven’t been well.”

“Of course,” Kakashi replied and gave him what he hoped was a reassuring smile, before turning and walking quickly in the direction of the training grounds. He could feel questioning gazes of the two adults on his back, but he ignored them as the sweet relief of solo training was calling him, giving him some time to decipher his previous thoughts and the piece of information that seemed so important.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I was doing a little research and it turns out there are a heap of contradictions on the ages of Kakashi, Obito and Rin and when they became jounin and chunin, as well as Kakashi’s age when Minato died. I swear I read somewhere that Kakashi was 13 when he made jounin, so that will be canon in my story.   
> So, for my story:  
> \- Kakashi becomes jounin at 13  
> \- Obito and Rin are 1 year older than Kakashi  
> \- Kakashi was 14 when Minato died (wow that is a sucky couple of years)  
> \- Minato was 24 when he died
> 
> If anyone has a problem with that, I'm sorry, but I won't be changing as it would ruin my plans.


	3. An Old Friend

Minato and Kushina watched Kakashi’s retreating form in bewildered silence. Minato had asked his girlfriend to meet them to act as a second opinion on Kakashi’s depressive behaviour that morning, but he had not expected his student to be acting _this_ bizarre. He turned to Kushina, who, by the look on her face, seemed to be mirroring his thoughts.

“Well that was… odd,” she began, keeping her eyes on where Kakashi had disappeared to. “I thought you said he seemed upset?”

Minato frowned, “He still is. I took him by surprise this morning, he’s just better at hiding it now.”

“Really?” Kushina questioned, turning to look the blond in the eye. “Because I don’t know what a lot of that was, but he seemed much closer to _happy_ than sad.”

He supposed that was fair, his student had been in a good mood for their brief lunch, apart from when he appeared to get lost in his own thoughts. He struggled to remember the last time Kakashi had openly looked that content, he had even _teased_ him. Still, there was something not right, he was sure of it.

“Maybe he’s just growing up,” Kushina continued, diverting her attention back to her ramen. “You know… puberty and all. Makes kids act weird.” She happily slurped her food, ignoring the flat look Minato gave her.

“This is _not_ puberty- _chew_ Kushina, honestly,” he rolled his eyes fondly as the red-head struggled to swallow the large mouthfuls she was taking.

Kushina coughed and wiped her mouth, “You- You don’t think you’re overreacting just a little bit? I mean, this is _Kakashi_ we’re talking about. That kid can handle anything, I’ve never seen anyone like him before. He was practically born to be a shinobi.”

“That’s what I’m worried about, he is still just a kid,” Minato sighed, running his hands through his hair. “You didn’t see him this morning, he just looked…” He trailed off helplessly, not being able to find the words to describe Kakashi’s dishevelled state. He was worried. He had caught Kakashi off guard, not something that happened often, at a moment where he hadn’t yet closed up and put on his usual mask of indifference. And Minato didn’t like what he saw.

Sensing the seriousness of her boyfriend’s concern, Kushina turned to give him her full attention. “Okay. Take me through what happened, all of it.”

Minato smiled in thanks before beginning, “Well it started when he was _late_ to training this morning, and by late I mean even later than Obito. That freaked Obito out a bit, he was convinced that Kakashi had died in his sleep or been eaten by one of his ninken or something just as ridiculous,” Kushina snorted. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so worried for Kakashi, not that he’d admit it of course, so I said I’d go make sure he hadn’t been murdered. Kakashi wasn’t at his house-“

“You said earlier he was in the woods or something,” Kushina interrupted and Minato nodded. “What the hell was he doing out there?”

“No idea. He was at one of the old training grounds too,” the blond frowned, pausing before continuing. “I called out to him, and… he just didn’t look like Kakashi, not at that moment. For a second I thought it was someone else.”

“…What do you mean?” Kushina asked gently, resting a reassuring hand on his arm.

“I don’t know, he just looked… distraught or something. I’ve never seen him look like that before, let alone look at _me_ like that. Even the whole Sakumo situation… that was nothing like this.”

Kushina rested the tip of her chopstick against her mouth in thought. She didn’t know Kakashi as well as Minato did and she was sure that the stoic kid merely tolerated her, but she did feel some affection towards him. If the blond beside her was this worried about his student, despite said student being a certified genius who seemed determined to have no friends, she supposed she could do her best to help out. “I mean, he’s had a pretty traumatic childhood as it is, do you think it’s just all caught up to him? He doesn’t seem like someone who’s big on the whole ‘emotions’ thing, assuming that whatever is going on is mental related.”

“I suppose it could be,” Minato considered. “He looked like he had been crying. Although he claims now that he’s got some eye problem, which appears to be true I guess.”

“Oh yeah I was wondering about that… Just keep an eye on him, Minato, and if it’s something terrible I’m sure he’ll talk to you about it. I mean, who else would he tell besides you?”

Harsh but fair, Minato decided.

“I guess…” he conceded and turned back to his ramen, which was now cold. “Maybe whatever is bothering him will pass, it came on pretty fast so hopefully it leaves the same. I just…” Minato sighed despairingly, “I just can’t forget that look on his face, it’s going to haunt me for a while I think.”

“Of course, you care about him,” Kushina said and discreetly slid Minato’s bowl over to herself, returning his deadpan look with a cheeky grin. “What? You weren’t eating it. Anyway, tell me about Kakashi’s face. How messed up are his teeth?”

* * *

Meanwhile, Kakashi had made it to an empty training ground without having to see anyone remotely jarring. The plan was to assess his current capabilities and get used to fighting in a significantly smaller body. Kakashi grumbled to himself as he stretched out his limbs, why had he been so damn _short_. Predictably, it took some time to adjust as he practiced taijutsu on a wooden dummy and barely managed to land any hits, however the main difficulty was maintaining his focus and not letting his mind wander. He couldn’t for the life of him decipher his earlier thoughts, which he knew had something to do with Obito, so instead his mind took him to other places.

He thought about where his friends were right now, about how he was not the only one who had had moments in his life he wished he could change. He thought about Tenzō, who was probably either being experimented on and tortured by Orochimaru or being brainwashed in Root by Danzō. Was there anything he could realistically do to help him? He didn’t know where Orochimaru’s current base was and he had next to no chance in battle against the member of the sannin, likely even with the sharingan. On the other hand, Danzō always ensured that Root was air-tight and the Sandaime had frequently turned a blind eye to the scheming of his old friend. It was likely too late for him to significantly help Tenzō now. Kakashi delivered a particularly ferocious kick to the dummy, causing it to crack slightly under the pressure.

And then there was Itachi. While they had never been friends, Kakashi had held a level of respect for the young shinobi, which was momentarily broken when he took out his entire clan (save Sasuke) and then restored when he learned of the full story. Itachi couldn’t have been more than four years old right now, and Kakashi found himself absolutely determined to prevent the massacre from happening. Not just for Sasuke’s sake, as the boy never really recovered from the trauma, but also for Itachi himself. Who had given everything to Konoha and received nothing in return. _If there’s someone who really deserves a better future, it’s that kid_ , Kakashi decided and delivered a quick succession of punches to the protesting wooden contraption.

Preventing an event that was the result of years of tension and contempt would be difficult, if it could even be done. If he remembered correctly, suspicion and distrust of the Uchiha clan had resurfaced with the Kyūbi attack the night Naruto was born. Many had felt that the Uchiha had some involvement in the attack, as the sharingan held the ability to control the tailed beasts-

Kakashi hissed and held his head as it ached, whatever key information that was torturing him had something to do with that night. The night that Minato, Kushina and many Konoha shinobi died. He could feel his subconscious screaming at him, and he knew… he _knew_ what it meant. Maybe the reason the information wouldn’t come to him was because he _didn’t want it to_. He did not want to have to deal with the revelation and the consequences it would bring with it, it was all already too much.

“MY ETERNAL RIVAL!” A familiar voice interrupted his dark thoughts, and Kakashi could not help the small smile that pulled at the corner of his mouth. He turned around to find perhaps his closest friend, clad in the only item of clothing Kakashi swore he owned, posing dramatically. Maito Gai was a constant in Kakashi’s life, whether it was a constant annoyance or simply a constant presence he knew he could always trust. The familiarity that he brought eased the tension and panic that was building up in Kakashi’s mind, and not for the first time he was thankful for his friend’s cheerful demeanour. “I challenge you to…” Gai trailed off, clearly expecting Kakashi to disappear before he could finish.

It was at this moment that Kakashi felt a wave of regret wash over him. While he and Gai had become good friends over time and Kakashi would often tease the exuberant shinobi with over the top nonchalance, he remembered how truly unkind he had been at this age. In his younger years, Kakashi had selfishly believed that none of his peers could ever have experienced more pain and hardship than him, with his early promotions, exposure to battle and the loss of his father. Looking at Gai now, whose wide grin was trembling ever so slightly at the corners you could only notice if you were specifically looking for it, Kakashi realised how stupid he had been. He had only found out much later in life what had happened to Gai’s father and what he did to save his son, and considering that it must have been recent, he wasn’t about to let Gai wallow in grief alone this time around.

“What about a spar?” Kakashi suggested and Gai’s eyes lit up, his grin returning in full force. “I missed training this morning.”

“I would be honoured to spar with you, my rival!” Gai gave him an enthusiastic thumbs-up, clearly surprised yet pleased with this turn of events. “What will be the rules of this duel?”

Kakashi pondered the question. Well… he might as well consolidate his earlier training with the dummy. “Taijutsu only.” Probably a death wish against Gai of all people, as he was likely the strongest taijutsu user ever. But that was adult Gai.

To his surprise, Gai hesitated briefly.

“I am afraid I cannot accept those terms,” said Gai resolutely and Kakashi blinked in surprise. Why on earth would _Gai_ refuse a _taijutsu_ spar? “With your eye covered it would not be a fair fight!”

Ah of course, Gai probably thought he was injured (which he supposed he was) and didn’t want to exploit that. He couldn’t know that Kakashi had had years of practice of fighting without the use of his left eye. He smiled slightly at the fact that the jumpsuit clad shinobi hadn’t even pried into why his eye was covered in the first place.

“Gai, it’s no problem really. It won’t affect me too much… Er…” Kakashi trailed off as he watched in disbelief as his old friend untied his own hiate-ate from his waist and retied it around his head, also covering his own left eye.

“AHA!” Gai laughed triumphantly, his hands on his hips. He looked utterly ridiculous, although Kakashi supposed that he himself didn’t look too different. “Now we are equal. I can now accept your terms, Kakashi!”

Kakashi felt his heart clench at the gesture. Honestly, how had he been such an asshole to the kid in front of him in the past. Gai, of all people, did not deserve to be treated that way. He followed his old friend into the clearing and mirrored his defensive stance, his mouth twitching as he observed Gai’s intense one-eyed gaze. Kakashi nodded once, and Gai announced, “Begin!”

Kakashi quickly brought his arm up to block the flying kick aimed for his chest, countering with a swift jab of his own that was similarly stopped. Twelve year old Gai was definitely not even close to the league of thirty year old Gai, but he was still pretty damn good. Kakashi flipped backwards to avoid another barrage of punches, and reached for a kunai. He sliced forward and Gai ducked in anticipation, however the weapon did not reach nearly far enough and Kakashi inwardly cursed his short arms. Unfortunately, this left him wide open for Gai to quickly grab his wrist and throw him to the far side of the training ground.

Kakashi grunted as he hit the ground and barely had a second to reorganise his bearings before he swiftly rolling aside to avoid Gai stomping on where his body had been. Okay… this was slightly more difficult than he had anticipated. Kunai still in hand, he made a swipe for Gai’s legs causing him to jump to avoid it.

They traded punches and blocks as Kakashi continued to swing the kunai, and he began to notice the lack of usual pinpoint accuracy in the delivery of Gai’s blows. He was slightly faster than Kakashi, even at this age, but his insistence to wear the headband was clearly hindering him. Kakashi had years to adjust to the different in depth perception and, despite his own disadvantage of not being accustomed to shorter arms and legs, he quickly gained the advantage in the spar. Before long, he found an opening and took it, delivering a strong kick to the knee before holding Gai to the ground and pointing his kunai at him unthreateningly.

Gai paused before huffing in disappointment, “…Yield,” he said reluctantly. It took nearly all of Kakashi’s self-control not to even let out a cough of laughter. Honestly, the green jumpsuit combined with the covered eye was a _look_ , even for Gai. Kakashi offered him a hand and Gai took it, his bright smile returning to his face as he took off his hiate-ate and let Kakashi pull him to his feet. “You are a formidable opponent as always, Kakashi!”

“As are you,” Kakashi replied with his signature eye smile, and Gai blinked furiously- whether it was in surprise or a repression of tears, he was not sure. They stood in silence for a few seconds (a feat he previously thought impossible) as Kakashi deliberated whether or not to proceed with what he was thinking. He knew that, at this age, his younger self would have despised such words… but Gai was not him, and he wasn’t even sure Gai was capable of despising anything that wasn’t truly evil.

“Gai…” he began hesitantly and Gai raised his rather large eyebrows in response, bouncing on the balls of his feet. Kakashi realised with a pang that Gai was simply happy that he was _talking_ to him, _ugh I hate myself_. “I-I’m sorry about your father.” Gai’s expression dropped and he curled his shoulders forward, clearly upset. _Shit… it better not have happened fucking yesterday or something, and I’ve gone and made it worse…_ But he had started this, so he should finish it. “He was a good man.”

And he was. Maito Dai had faced down the Seven Swordsmen of the Hidden Mist and taken out _four_ of them, doing so by activating the eight gates. Sacrificing his life to save that of his son’s and his teammates. If that didn’t make him a hero, Kakashi didn’t know what did. And he wanted Gai to know that too, because he doubted that many knew what really happened or offered much kindness to the son of the man that was so often mocked. But Kakashi couldn’t tell Gai that his father was a hero, because he wasn’t supposed to know.

“Ah,” Gai’s quiet reply pulled Kakashi from his thoughts, and he looked his friend in the eye and then quickly looked away. Gai’s eyes were filled with tears, and not the happy or dramatic type that he often shared with his student Rock Lee, but tears of sadness and _thankfulness_ that made Kakashi’s gut clench. “Thank you, Kakashi.”

He nodded and let Gai compose himself, his gaze focused on the battered wooden dummy and not on the sniffing shinobi beside him. He waited around half a minute before Gai cleared his throat.

“Now,” he started, voice shaking slightly as he moved into a ridiculous dramatic pose. “As punishment for losing our one-eyed taijutsu battle, I will run four hundred laps around the village!” Kakashi watched in amusement as Gai began retying his hiate-ate around his waist, before getting an idea.

“Wait,” he said and Gai looked up at him in surprise, lines of dry tears around his eyes. Kakashi simply tapped his own headband. The jumpsuit clad shinobi blinked at him before understanding.

“Ah!” He tied the hiate-ate around his eye again and grinned at Kakashi. “I will run four hundred laps around the village… WITH ONLY ONE EYE!”

He took off, leaving a billow of dusk behind him. Kakashi let out a chuckle and looked up at the darkening sky, wondering again whether he had done the right thing in giving his condolences. He hadn’t done it in the past and to his knowledge that didn’t have an effect on his and Gai’s relationship… but it had felt like the right thing to do. And he decided that if his first act after travelling back in time (aside from worrying Minato sick and nearly gouging out an eye) was to do something that Gai would appreciate, he was happy.

Beginning to move back towards his home, Kakashi was struck by another thought. _I believe the White Fang was a hero_ … Obito had said that to him, once upon a time. And he believed that now, despite who said it. Both his father and Maito Dai were heroes. Kakashi decided that his next act post time travel would be to pay his respects to his father, who he remembered, when he died the first time, was unable to move on and see his mother.

_Perhaps_ , Kakashi suddenly considered as his house came into view, the light outside nearly gone, _it will be my third act_. Tomorrow of course would bring morning training, which he should not miss two days in a row. This would bring an early start as he should probably be on time as to not rouse too much suspicion, or worry, from Minato.

Yes, his father could wait just a little longer.

Tomorrow would bring him the faces of his greatest heartbreak and his greatest betrayal, and he did not trust himself to not do _something_ when faced with the two people ( _children_ , something in his mind reminded him) who were involved in the most traumatic experiences in his life. He needed to do some major meditation before he went, because Minato was obviously going to be watching him like a hawk and would psychoanalyse any slight movement or reaction.

It was becoming very clear to him that tomorrow was going to be a shit day, to say the least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of damn THINKING in these early chapters, and I apologise for that. But I need to properly establish Kakashi’s mindset now so his later actions make more sense. Also, I just love Gai. He is such a pure character and one of Kishi’s best creations, probably next to Kakashi himself.  
> Also, how unfortunate is the name Maito Dai/Might Duy. Not sure how much of a chance he had of a long life.
> 
> I promise the chapters will get longer as I get further into the story.


	4. A Difficult Training

To say that Kakashi didn’t sleep well that night would be an understatement. In fact, he wasn’t sure he slept at all. He had spent over two hours meditating on the lounge room floor before lying down in bed, and while he felt that he could breathe easier, his mind was once again on full alert. He wasn’t sure who he was dreading more, the boy who would eventually kill him (and many others) or the girl he would eventually kill. It was a lose-lose situation, really. And he somehow needed to keep Minato from sensing his unease. Um. Good luck.

_Maybe I should just tell him_ , Kakashi pondered as he stared intently at the ceiling, the early morning light starting to creep through the window. But he couldn’t. It was his burden, his mistakes, his failures that had caused the future horrors. He felt ashamed at how he had let things get so badly out of hand. _Minato was your sensei, and he was Obito’s sensei too_ , a small, bitter part of his mind whispered, _it is just as much his fault as it is yours_. Kakashi shook his head immediately, he couldn’t think like that. Obito’s ‘death’ was his fault, he had accepted that. But everything that the warped and messed up version of Obito had done after that was Obito’s fault, not Kakashi’s. And honestly, if you based the entire reason for your existence and sanity around the continued living of one person (who happened to be a damn shinobi during the war), he wasn’t sure that logic could be applied to such a mental state.

He understood that Obito was beyond despair when Rin had died, he was the same, but that was no excuse to go on a decade long rampage and kill innocent people. Kakashi groaned and rested his hands on his face, his heart beating wildly in his chest. The pieces were falling into place in his mind, and he couldn’t stop it. It was so damn _obvious_ , but he just didn’t want to see it.

The Kyūbi attack.

Obito was responsible for it.

It was probably under the instruction of a close to death Uchiha Madara, but Obito had still carried it out. He had killed Minato and Kushina, and robbed Naruto of the loving family he deserved. Not to mention taking countless other lives.

Covering his face with his pillow, Kakashi attempted to slow his breathing and heartrate. Why was he here? Why did he have to do this all _again_? What had even brought him back in time? His life was hard enough the first time around, he didn’t want to have to re-live his most painful moments. It was a morbid thought, but Kakashi was almost relieved that he hadn’t been brought back even further in the past. The vision of his invincible father sprawled on the floor, surrounded by blood and his tanto embedded in his stomach nearly broke him the first time.

_I… I don’t think I can do this…_ Kakashi pressed the pillow harder into his face as he felt the sensation of tears beginning form. And to think he had once called Obito the cry-baby ninja. Maybe he should skip training again today… and the next day…

Taking a deep breath, Kakashi released the pillow and sat up. He had covered his left eye with a cloth over night to prevent him attempting to gouge it out again, which appeared to have worked. Sighing deeply and wiping the tear from his exposed eye, he turned to stare out the window. He would have to face his teammates someday, and skipping training would only cause more problems in the future. That was something he didn’t need at the moment.

Kakashi took a moment to groan forlornly before beginning to get dressed in his shinobi attire, going about his regular morning routine. It was so strange to walk around his apartment again, yet it was surprisingly easy to put his mind on auto-pilot and let his muscle memory carry him around the building. He finally came to a stop in front of the mirror, fidgeting with the hitai-ate in his hands.

The redness in his eye had calmed down considerably, and he couldn’t help but feel a jolt as he was met with a dark iris and not the familiar red of the sharingan. However, there were still harsh gashes and irritation and, if he were being honest, a part of him longed for the familiarity of the slanted headband. _One more day_ , he reasoned with himself, _no harm in having it like this for one more day_. After tying his hitai-ate and covering his eye, Kakashi took in the rest of his appearance.

….Well at least he looked as bad as he felt. Not sleeping will do that to you.

Steeling himself, Kakashi dragged his feet to the training grounds, his entire body tensing up the closer he got as if it were telling him this was a _very bad idea_ and to _abort mission now_. Not even the warmth of the morning sun and the light breeze could improve his depressive mood. In the distance he could hear laughter and he cringed…

Obito was early.

_Abort. Abort. Abort._

But he needed to be calm. Obito… Obito was just a child right now. A child who would turn into a monster in only a few years… but a child nonetheless.

Plan A was to pretend Rin did not exist. Pretend Obito did not exist. And convince Minato everything was fine. Simple.

Blinking, Kakashi realised he was walking so slow that he was almost stagnant, the training ground not even 100 metres away. Minato could probably sense him just standing there like an idiot so he took a couple of deep breaths, relaxed his face into the most blank expression he could muster, and strode forward determinedly.

“Come on sensei, you know I’m just as good as that bastard! Teach me please, please, please?!”

“Obito, don’t speak about your teammates like that. I’m not sure if you’re up to it yet-“

“Course I am! I train just as hard as- Oi, Bakakashi, you’re late!”

Kakashi kept his eyes on the ground, his heart beating wildly in his chest. He could feel beads of sweat beginning to form on his brow. The animalistic urge to skewer Obito right then and there itched at him painfully, so he avoided looking at his teammate and instead focused on his sensei.

“Sorry for my lateness, sensei,” Kakashi rasped. “I got side-tracked this morning.”

Minato frowned, “That’s alright Kakashi, are… are you feeling better today?” The expression on the blond-haired jōnin’s face suggested that he didn’t think so.

“Doesn’t look like it,” Obito agreed with Minato’s sentiment before Kakashi could answer. “You look like crap, Kakashi. And what the hell happened to your eye?”

“Obito…” Minato warned, clearly thinking that it was only a matter of time before Kakashi exploded at the young Uchiha. He wasn’t completely wrong. Minato turned to where Kakashi hadn’t dared to look, and he felt his heart drop in trepidation. “Rin, Kakashi was having trouble with his eye, do you think you could have a look at it?”

Nope. Not okay.

“Of course-“

“It’s fine!” Kakashi choked out, interrupting the kind voice. He did not want her anywhere near him, and he especially did not want her anywhere near his goddamn _eye_. “It’s fine, really,” he repeated more calmly, willing himself to _act normal_. He was an _adult_. “My eye is feeling better today, sensei. Let’s just train.”

“Then why did you cover it again?”

Minato was peering at him with confusion, and Kakashi could practically _feel_ the curiosity seeping out of Obito, who he was still yet to look at. This was so not going how he had hoped it would.

“It’s for training,” he maintained eye contact with his sensei, willing Minato to believe him. “I was sparring yesterday with Gai-“

“You were _willingly_ training with that weirdo?” _And not with us_ , was left unsaid, but he could tell that Obito was upset by the fact that it appeared Kakashi had chosen the crazy green guy over his teammates.

Minato sighed, “Obito, be nice.”

“I’m sorry sensei, but he scares me.”

Kakashi resisted the urge to roll his eyes, imagining the same words coming out of older, psychotic maniac Obito’s mouth. Although, he supposed it wasn’t too far from reality. Gai was incredibly powerful, and he didn’t doubt that older Obito likely had felt some level of fear towards him.

“I’m sure Gai is really… nice,” Rin said hesitantly, causing Obito to splutter indignantly. Kakashi took in a deep breath and decided to look at her, steeling himself for the familiar aching in his chest. She was younger than he remembered, but she still had the same soft features and gentle demeanour. Eyes bright with kindness and not the shock and pain he remembered as he drove his raikiri through-

Kakashi looked away quickly and focused back on his sensei, who unfortunately had the same concerned look as yesterday as he observed his complicated student.

Obito was still talking, “…guess there is a chance he could be nice, Rin, but that doesn’t mean that he isn’t weird and to be honest I’m not sure that-“

“Alright, Obito,” Minato interrupted, smiling faintly at the babbling Uchiha. “Kakashi was telling us about his eye.”

Kakashi sighed quietly. He knew today was going to be painful, but it was the _familiarity_ that was hurting him the most. Everything was the same, as if nothing had happened at all and the people in front of him weren’t either dead or evil. And nothing _had_ happened from their point of view… except to him. Kakashi could feel a headache coming on and Minato turned to him expectantly.

“I was sparring with Gai and we agreed that it was good to practice taijutsu with different depth perceptions in case it was required in battle.” Technically a lie, but Gai would probably agree with anything if he phrased it right. 

“That’s… very specific,” Minato said humorously. Kakashi shrugged.

“I still can’t believe you were training with that nutcase, I thought you hated him… Oh! Does he have something on you?!” Kakashi could hear the excitement in Obito’s voice and resisted the urge to roll his eyes again, the idea of _Gai_ actually _blackmailing_ someone was ridiculous. He wasn’t even sure that Gai knew what blackmail was.

“Yes well I needed some sort of an actual challenge,” Kakashi retorted without thinking, giving his teammate a flat look before stilling and looking away. His heartrate rose again as he tried to regain his composure. Plan A was a complete failure so far.

“Hey! I’ll have you know that sensei is going to be helping _me_ today so I can kick your ass, you idiot!” Obito pointed at him dramatically, not noticing the internal struggle Kakashi was experiencing as he contemplated stabbing the Uchiha in the neck. He didn’t have the sharingan that future Obito would constantly have activated, but looking at the child who would grow up to murder many of the people closest to him put more strain on him than it should. _He’s just a kid, he hasn’t done anything yet. He’s just a kid. He hasn’t done anything. Yet._

He kept his killing intent in check but Minato must have sensed his annoyance as his sensei laughed lightly to diffuse any tension. “Alright, let’s start training. Kakashi, I did promise Obito I would help him today if that’s alright.” Kakashi shrugged in response. He knew he was being rude, but he couldn’t bring himself to care right as this moment. “Uh, right. Rin said yesterday she would like to improve her taijutsu before our next mission, would you be able to spar with her a bit and give her some pointers?”

_No thanks_ , Kakashi groaned internally. He supposed that it was better than the alternative; helping Obito. If he didn’t chill the fuck out soon, Minato would send him straight to T & I and Kakashi did not fancy being interrogated by a younger, more enthusiastic Inoichi.

“Sure…” Kakashi replied hesitantly and looked at the brown haired girl, softening his expression slightly as she gave him a shy smile. “We’ll just go over there,” he gestured to the opposite end of the training ground and Minato nodded once in understanding. A strange expression had crossed Obito’s face as his eyes flickered between Kakashi and Rin, and Kakashi tilted his head in confusion before it him.

Obito was in love with Rin. But he had forgotten that Rin, a thirteen year old girl, was in love with him, a thirty year old man. Of course Rin didn’t know he was thirty… but this was still less than ideal.

_Honestly… today has sucked so far_.

Resigned to his fate, Kakashi sighed and move away from Obito and Minato, Rin trailing behind him. He could hear his sensei begin the arduous task of explaining a jutsu to the young Uchiha, and he couldn’t help but pity Minato.

“Alright…” Kakashi began once they had reached a respectable distance, refusing to make eye contact with Rin. He grimaced when he noticed that she was also slightly taller than him. “You wanted to work on taijutsu?”

Rin nodded, “Yes, thank you for agreeing to help me, Kakashi. We have already warmed up, but I can wait for you if you’d like.”

“Oh no it’s fine,” Kakashi waved her off. “I warmed up at home, which is why I was late.” If you could class hyperventilating as training. “Anything in particular you wanted to work on?”

Rin was gazing at him in a mixture of surprise and confusion, and Kakashi realised he probably never said this much to her in a week, let alone 20 seconds. Hopefully she wasn’t getting the wrong idea. His younger self was mostly unaware (or intentionally ignorant) of her affections before, and Kakashi wished he still was because it was unbelievably uncomfortable having her stare at him like that.

“Er… well yes,” Rin’s soft voice interrupted his thoughts. “I’d like to be able to defend better. As a medic-nin I need to make sure I have a very low chance of injury.”

“Sometimes the best way to improve your defensive skills is to strengthen your attacks,” Kakashi replied and Rin blinked.

“You’re right, but that doesn’t really apply to me. I’d be putting more than myself at risk if I got injured. The only reason medical shinobi are even on the battlefield is because of the war.”

“Well what about Tsunade?” Countered Kakashi, crossing his arms.

“Lady Tsunade is one of a kind,” said Rin, her eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “There probably won’t be anyone else like her ever.” _Wrong_ , Kakashi thought, his pink-haired student coming to mind. “But… but if that’s what you really think… I guess I can…” She trailed off, smiling at him hesitantly.

Kakashi realised he was being mildly unreasonable. Rin had come to him for help and here he was bossing her around like she was one of his students, he needed to get a grip.

“No, it’s okay,” Kakashi gave her a reassuring eye smile and Rin balked in response. “We can start with working on defending. Sorry for pushing it, I just didn’t want you to restrict yourself.”

“Oh, um… thank you,” she blushed. Kakashi felt his eye twitch and turned away, noticing that Minato had started demonstrating the jutsu (which appeared to be fire-based) with Obito watching in fascination.

“Well,” Kakashi began, turning back to his brown haired teammate. “Let’s spar and I’ll assess what you need to work on.” Rin nodded once and moved into a defensive position. It took everything for Kakashi to focus his mind on the present and not the last time he had seen the kind girl.

The spar was short, and Kakashi realised pretty quickly that Rin was right; her defensive taijutsu _was_ weak. A large part was due to poor footwork and low stamina, and he couldn’t help but wonder if this was always the case and he simply hadn’t noticed. It wasn’t uncommon for his younger self (and older self, if he were being honest) to not pay close attention to those around him. Rin was a chūnin, but that was mostly due to her medical ninjutsu abilities, her taijutsu was at genin level.

Restraining a portion of the power, he aimed a punch at her gut and Rin moved to block it. However, she lacked any speed and opened herself to a range of deadly attacks if she were facing an enemy. Kakashi cringed and stepped back, ending the spar. He swallowed the lump in his throat and looked at the ground.

“You’ll need to work on stamina and fitness first before you can really improve,” he said, scratching at his covered left eye. He hoped that wouldn’t become a habit.

Rin nodded, not appearing too concerned about the abrupt ending of the spar. “Should I do extra training then for stamina?”

“Yes,” Kakashi agreed. “You should start today.”

Contemplating whether or not he should assist her with the training, Kakashi’s decision was quickly made when Rin smiled at him happily, clearly pleased that he was actually taking the time to help her. He never thought he would see that smile again, and seeing it now he didn’t feel like he deserved it. Whatever happened with Obito, whatever he decided to do, Kakashi vowed that he would do his absolute best to protect Rin. Not for Obito, or even himself, but for her… because out of them she most deserved a second chance.

They went through a number of exercises, Kakashi using this time to further adapt to his shorter body. He discovered that his own fitness was significantly lower than he was used to, his breathing becoming laboured during the training and his legs beginning to ache. The hours passed quickly and soon enough the four of them gathered to signify the end of training.

“Great work today guys!” Minato said cheerfully. Obito was lying on the ground next to him, trying to catch his breath. “How about some dango? My treat.”

Obito whooped and did a weak fist pump, causing Rin to giggle at his antics. Her hair was clinging to her face as she wiped her brow, her knees shaking slightly in exhaustion.  

“Come on up Obito,” Minato reached down and pulled the Uchiha to his feet, laughing as Obito wobbled around dramatically. “We’ll work on it more tomorrow. The phoenix flower jutsu is not easy. Are you sure none of your clansman can teach you? They will probably be able to help you more than me.”

“Nah. I like you more, sensei,” Obito grinned, adjusting his goggles and sneaking a look at Rin.

Kakashi was watching the scene quietly, willing his gut to stop twisting painfully. Obito was just… _the same_. Still cheerful, still in love with Rin, and still struggling to be accepted by his clan. Subconsciously leaning closer to the boy, Kakashi searched for anything dark that could suggest the beginnings of insanity. Something that his younger self had previously missed. There was nothing obvious, but Kakashi _knew_ it had to be there. If he saved Obito from getting crushed by the rock, and saved Rin from being forced into becoming a jinchuriki, would Obito stay as this laughing, carefree boy, or would simply another event cause him to go insane? As much as he wished he could and swore that he would protect her, Kakashi couldn’t guarantee Rin’s safety. Experiencing loss was a gruesome requirement for being a shinobi, he knew that more than anyone.

Kakashi blinked and looked away, noticing with a sigh that Minato had been watching him.

“Will you be joining us, Kakashi?” Minato inquired, Obito pausing his animated explanation of the fireball jutsu to Rin to wait for his response.

“Not today, sensei. I have some things I need to take care of,” Kakashi attempted to sound cheerful to cover up his dark mood, but this only appeared to freak Obito out more.

Minato sighed, clearly expecting that answer. “Well just make sure you find the time to have lunch, we’ll be at the dango stand if you change your mind.”

_Is he reminding me to eat? What the hell?_ Kakashi blinked a few times before looking away, instead focusing on a flock of birds that were passing over the clear sky. A few days ago he was at war, fighting for his life and watching comrades die. He was uncomfortable now and painful memories seemed to be wherever he looked, but at least Konoha and the people he cared about were safe. And he had been given the chance to keep it that way… that was the most important thing.

Looking back at the man he considered family, and ignoring Obito’s positively bewildered expression, Kakashi let his lip curl up into a slight smile. “Enjoy your lunch.”

* * *

“I think whatever happened to his eye has moved up and infected his brain,” Obito said, picking at his food. Despite the strenuous training that Minato had put him through, the young Uchiha couldn’t seem to find his appetite.

“He was acting really strange this morning,” Rin agreed, although her worry was more visible in the way her wide eyes looked at their sensei for answers.

“I don’t think I’ve ever _wanted_ someone to insult me before,” Obito continued. “Are we sure it’s not a fake Kakashi? I mean he didn’t even make fun of me for sucking at the phoenix flower jutsu.”

“It’s a very difficult justu, Obito,” Minato said kindly. The three of them had made their way to a bench after Minato purchased the dango. So far, only he had made progress on the food.

“It shouldn’t be for me though,” Obito grumbled. “Anyway, that wouldn’t have stopped Kakashi from pissing on me about it… at least, it wouldn’t have stopped the _real_ Kakashi. This fake one hates my guts though.”

_So he did notice that_ , Minato noted. If there was one thing clear about this morning, it was that Kakashi was very upset with Obito.

“He doesn’t hate you, Obito,” Rin tried to reassure the boy, but Obito shook his head vigorously.

“He so does. He was so mad at me. I don’t even know what I did… did I say something bad, Minato-sensei?”

Minato had no idea why Kakashi was so resentful towards the young Uchiha, but it was clear by Obito’s genuine confusion that whatever had happened was accidental on his part. They often clashed due to differing personalities and priorities, but this was different.

“I can’t say for sure… but I do know that Kakashi hasn’t been well-“

Obito huffed in indignation, “He was perfectly fine two days ago!”

“Obito,” Minato said sternly. “You and Rin both noticed his odd behaviour, I saw it yesterday too. Something is bothering Kakashi, and as his teammates you need to support him.”

“He seemed… really sad,” Rin said hesitantly. Minato nodded, a part of him relieved that someone else (and of course it was Rin) had noticed what he had so clearly seen yesterday. Kakashi was _sad_.

They sat in silence for a minute, Obito and Rin finally beginning to eat the dango. They were both concerned for their younger teammate, no matter how loudly Obito tried to cover it up. Minato was worried too. Kushina had told him to take a step back and give Kakashi space, but he so badly wanted to track his student down and see what he was up to right now. Spying on his student could backfire massively though, and he couldn’t afford to lose Kakashi’s trust right when he needed him most.

“Obito, Rin,” he said, breaking the silence and capturing their attention. “If something happens… be sure to let me know, okay? With the war we need to be completely focused, and if there is something wrong with Kakashi we can address it before it could become a hindrance in battle. Same goes for the two of you.”

“Okay,” Obito nodded, Rin mirroring this notion. “…But are you _sure_ he’s not an imposter?”

Minato rolled his eyes good-naturedly, “I’m sure, Obito.”

Obito looked like he was going to ask ‘how?’ before thinking better of it, if _Minato_ knew he was the real Kakashi, he had to believe him. No matter how dubious he was. However…

“So he’s not an imposter, but are you sure he’s not like… possessed or something? He was late _twice_. And he trained with _Gai_. What the hell?”

Sensing that Obito was probably going to babble needlessly the rest of the meal, Minato decided to try and relax and hopefully absorb some of the boy’s cheerful spirit. He caught Rin’s eye and saw that her mouth was pressed into a line and her eyebrows furrowed. She was an incredibly observant girl, and he trusted her to be tactful when it came to Kakashi (unlike Obito who was currently contemplating the possibility of demon possession). He meant what he said earlier too, a distracted Kakashi could spell trouble during the war.

Minato looked up at the sky, searching for whatever Kakashi had found before he left them after training. There was nothing but clear skies and a gentle breeze that felt soothing on his face. He would follow Kushina's advice for the time being, but if this strange (and slightly disturbing) behaviour went on for too much longer, Minato decided he would bring in some back-up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying my best to update as soon as I can, but uni is requiring an annoying amount of my time. I've got a string of assignments over the next week or two so I don't think I can update before then. Sorry :'(
> 
> A bit of dat ANGST in this chapter. I don't really enjoy writing it but it's necessary bc of the Obito and Rin feels. I won't write more of it than I have to, but Kakashi isn't having too much fun at the moment.
> 
> Also, Rin is so hard to write. I feel we don't really get much to her character from Kishi besides that she's really nice, she's a medical ninja, she has a crush on Kakashi (don't blame her there), and Obito is obsessed with her. If anyone can offer any feedback as to her character, I'm all ears. Obito on the other hand is so fun to write. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has left kudos, comments and bookmarks.


	5. A Hot Afternoon

Kakashi realised, with a sharp pang of disappointment (mostly for himself), that he didn’t know what his father would have wanted him to do in this kind of situation. Either he had forgotten, or he had simply never paid any attention. _A common theme_ , he thought bitterly.

The sun was beating down on his back as he stared at the memorial stone, two white chrysanthemums in his hand. Sakumo might have loved flowers, or he could have hated them. One thing was for sure, nobody was laying any flowers at his grave. Kakashi hadn’t even known that his father was given one, as he certainly wasn’t looking for it in his previous life. The heat was starting to make him feel slightly uncomfortable, beads of sweat forming on his brow, but he wasn’t about to move. He wasn’t going to take this moment away from his father.

Breathing deeply, his throat already dry, Kakashi stared hard at the stone and willed his father to hear him somehow.

“I forgive you.”

He wished he could see his father’s response, to know that his only son didn’t hate him anymore. Despite the impossibility of this idea, Kakashi felt a weight lift off his shoulders. His father could finally move on, and Kakashi didn’t have to carry the heavy guilt he so often felt when he imagined Sakumo sitting by that fire, waiting to see his mother.

Kakashi, perhaps subconsciously, had for a long time understood and admired the reasoning behind his father’s choice to place the lives of his teammates above completing a mission. Obito, as much as he despised him at the moment, had a lot to do with that. What he had truly struggled with was Sakumo’s decision to take his own life, leaving Kakashi alone as the last living Hatake at such a young age. His younger self’s obsession with rules was often just a cover for the betrayal that he had felt, a way to channel that anger into what he had viewed as useful. As his purpose. But he was an adult now, no matter how damn short he appeared, and he could understand. He could forgive.

Placing one of the flowers carefully beside the grave, Kakashi let the soft calls of the birds and sound of the breeze rustling through the trees envelope him. After a few beats of stillness, he moved slowly to another nearby grave. There was already a bunch of bluebells below the name ‘Maito Dai’, and Kakashi smiled slightly as he positioned his single flower next to them.

The moment of peace was interrupted when he sensed a presence (poorly) disguised in the trees behind him, he had been so focused on his father he hadn’t even considered anyone would be watching him. He was really losing touch, perhaps the younger body and mind really was having an effect on him. Walking away from Dai’s grave, he stared intently at the source of chakra, letting him know that he knew he was there.

And he knew it was a ‘him’, because he had spent years training with the idiot and he was exceptionally poor at repressing his chakra. At least he was as a child.

“Are you stalking me, Obito?” Kakashi called out, rolling his eyes as he felt the presence stutter in surprise. Honestly, how this kid turned out to be a mass murderer, he would never understand.

“No!” Came the indignant response from behind the tree, before Obito meekly appeared from his hiding place, his hands behind his back. Kakashi gave him his best deadpan look. He felt considerably more relaxed than a few hours ago, as seeing Obito did not almost give him a heart attack this time around. However, Kakashi could still feel the coils of hatred twist uncomfortably in his stomach. He could not forgive Obito like he forgave Sakumo. “I was just wondering where you went, the dango was amazing by the way.”

“Well… here I am.” There was no immediate reply from Obito, and Kakashi raised an eyebrow at the boy who looking anywhere but at him.

“Er… why _are_ you here…?” Obito asked, confused.

Kakashi realised that going from thinking his father was the scum of the earth to paying his respects at his grave looked mildly suspicious. Time to do what he did best; deflect.

“Why are _you_ here?”

“I just said why!” Obito fired up immediately, and Kakashi hid a smile. “You idiot, we just wondered where you were! You’ve been acting even more weird than usual.”

“So they sent you to spy on me? If Minato-sensei didn’t want me to find out, he shouldn’t have sent the shinobi equivalent of an elephant.”

Obito huffed angrily, “Sensei didn’t _send_ me to do anything… I just wanted to make sure you weren’t sacrificing small animals or something.”

Kakashi blinked, _Um… what._ He had forgotten how _weird_ Obito could be sometimes.

Stuffing his hands in his pockets and relaxing his posture, he gave Obito his best bored look before starting to slink away in the direction of his home. It was hard seeing Obito here (although it was hard seeing him in general), a place where he had once come to remember the boy and apologise to him, not knowing that he was still alive and wreaking havoc on the world.

“Hey!” Obito called out and Kakashi stilled, his instincts screaming at him to fling a couple of kunai at the source of the voice. He could hear the undisguised footsteps coming towards him and turned slowly, his hand twitching. The Uchiha didn’t appear to notice his struggle though as he thrust a container into his hands.

“Sensei wanted to give you a couple of dango sticks… I told him the shinobi rules probably forbid eating yummy food, but he told me to give them to you anyway.”

Obito was standing close enough that Kakashi could see the unease partially hidden behind childish agitation. Although it was likely a subconscious shinobi instinct and Obito may not even recognise it, Kakashi realised as he eyed the boy, it was pretty clear. Obito was slightly afraid of him.

“I thought you said that sensei didn’t send you?” Kakashi said, accepting the box. Obito discreetly took a step backwards away from him.

“He didn’t,” Obito replied. “I just told him I was going to look for you and then he gave me the dango. It took me forever to find you, by the way, have you been here the whole time? Wait, what _were_ you doing here-“

Headache returning and rapidly losing his patience, Kakashi gave Obito a hard look.

“None of your business, Obito,” he hissed rudely, earning a surprised look from the Uchiha at his seemingly random mood swing. He started to walk away, hoping to shake him, but Obito was not getting the message (or was just ignoring it).

“Er… okay,” Obito replied awkwardly, matching his strides. There was no angry reply this time.

They walked in silence towards the village, Kakashi debating whether or not to shunshin away and leave Obito to make his own way back. A part of him was intrigued, however, by the boy’s change in behaviour towards him. Obito was pretty oblivious a lot of the time in most situations, but he was pretty in tune to other people’s emotions. Maybe he was simply curious is to why he was acting differently?

So many things had changed in the _two days_ he had been back in the past. For one, Kakashi was one hundred per cent sure that Rin had never asked him to help her with taijutsu. Had one missed training session caused such a change? What had happened when he wasn’t there that morning?

He stole a quick glance at Obito, who was staring intently ahead. The sun was reflecting harshly off his goggles and Kakashi could see beads of sweat forming around the side of his face, and he was clearly working hard to control his breathing. Obito was obviously uncomfortable with more than just the heat. Again, he did not know if this was a subconscious reaction to Kakashi’s internal struggle about the boy, or if he could actually sense his ill feelings towards him. He had held a general annoyance towards the Uchiha previously at this age, but some part of Obito must have sensed that this was different.

So why was he still walking with him?

“Oh, I forgot to tell you,” Obito interrupted his thoughts, “We have to report to the Hokage’s office.”

Kakashi sighed, “When?”

“Uhh… like now I think,” Obito frowned thoughtfully. “Or it could be a bit later, I’m not sure, I can’t remember.”

Kakashi rolled his eyes and Obito had the decency to look mildly sheepish. They fell back into silence, finally arriving at the outskirts of the village. The silence was more comfortable this time, but Obito had gained some confidence and seemed determined to fill it.

“Are you going to stop wearing your headband like a dumb eye patch when we go on the mission? Don’t get me wrong, eye patches can be cool, but only when there is a cool story to go with it. Like losing your eye in battle or something. It’s not cool though when you just start wearing it randomly, it just looks stupid. No one thinks you look cool with it, Kakashi-”

Kakashi ignored Obito’s rambling and looked around the village, still keeping hold on the box of dango. More people were milling around as it was getting close to dinner time, the sounds of conversation and laughter calming his fraying nerves. He spied the Hokage tower up ahead and wasn’t sure whether to shunshin straight there and leave Obito babbling about what constitutes a ‘cool eye patch’, or shunshin home so he didn’t have to see the Third and receive a mission so soon.

“-Are you even listening to me? Oh look, it’s your new best friend,” Obito gestured over to one of the smaller open eateries, and Kakashi followed his gaze to see a familiar flash of dark green.

Gai was waving at him enthusiastically, sitting next to a couple other familiar faces. Ebisu he had not known very well at all, he was a rather stuffy individual (not unlike himself) and Kakashi had only known him as one of Gai’s teammates and later as Sarutobi Konohamaru’s sensei. Genma on the other hand, Kakashi did know well, although not at this age. Genma had been on his ANBU squad for years and had seen the worst of him, he had been one of the few people Kakashi could trust to have his back. After Minato’s death and before he had his genin team, which had also forced him to interact more with the other jōnin, Kakashi’s inner circle had included Gai and Genma (and Tenzō, but it hurt too much to think of the boy right now).

Kakashi nodded in return, causing Gai to positively beam back at him. Genma raised a curious eyebrow at the exchange, a senbon needle positioned lazily between his teeth.

Next to him he could hear Obito huff in annoyance, “Don’t you care about being on time anymore?”

“I thought you said it could be another hour before we were scheduled to meet the Hokage,” Kakashi replied, tearing his gaze away from his old friends and continuing towards the tower.

“What I _said_ was I don’t remember. It could have been an hour ago that we were supposed to be there,” Obito paused before looking at Kakashi with eyes that were as accusatory as this Obito could ever muster. “The Kakashi I know would never even risk being late, especially to see the Hokage.”

Letting the sound of the rapidly filling streets fill the silence, Kakashi held back an amused snort at the fact that the first person to come to him with any sort of mild confrontation was Obito. He should have seen that coming, really.

Instead of showing his amusement, he kept it light in response, “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“I don’t know…” Obito narrowed his eyes. “But I’m not ruling out demon possession.”

This time Kakashi really did snort. Obito stared at him in disbelief with wide eyes and a slack jaw, so distracted by the show of emotion that he nearly walked smack into the door to the Hokage tower. Kakashi could feel the hatred that had been bubbling away inside him calm down ever so slightly at the familiar antics of the young Uchiha, and he quickly reminded himself that Obito was exactly the same as before. He was enthusiastic and happy, if not a little idiotic, but there was also something there that harboured dark thoughts and evil actions.

Within a couple of years, this same kid would kill Minato and Kushina.

He could not forget that.

Mood soured, he opened the door and they made their way up to the Hokage’s office. Two men passed them on the way up and Kakashi stuttered up a step when he recognised them as Uchiha. Although he had never seen them before, just the fact that there were regular Uchiha shinobi just walking around threw him off for a second. He hadn’t associated Obito with the Uchiha massacre, probably because he had died before it had occurred, and he had forgotten what it was like having them so present in the shinobi system.

Glancing back, he wondered if Obito had noticed his reaction. His teammate had his eyes downcast with almost an aura of shame surrounding him; perhaps Obito had known the two shinobi.

They finally reached the door to the Hokage’s office, and Kakashi couldn’t help but feel a swell of happiness as he saw Minato and Rin waiting for them. It was just so great to see them alive and well.

“Ah, just on time!” Minato called out cheerfully, he looked at the dango box in Kakashi’s hands and smiled happily at his youngest student. “Luckily you had Kakashi with you to make sure you weren’t late again, eh Obito?”

Obito spluttered indignantly, “Sensei! Kakashi has been later than me recently! Besides, I can’t help it if old ladies are always asking for my help.”

“It’s alright, I believe you,” Minato said. “The Hokage will be waiting for us now, let’s go in.”

They entered the room and bowed respectfully towards the figure behind the desk. Kakashi sensed a number of ANBU stationed around the building, not recognising the two stationed behind the Hokage.

“Ah, welcome Minato,” the Third began kindly, “My apologies to you and your team for the late notice of this meeting. We had another team lined up for this assignment but they were called to more pressing matters.”

“It is of no problem, Hokage-sama,” Minato replied. Kakashi snuck a look at Hiruzen and was immediately drawn to how much younger he looked. It was around fourteen years before his death at the hands of Orochimaru, but Kakashi remembered how quickly the Third had aged after Minato died. The stress of the position, particularly after losing the village’s most promising leader, had really affected him.

“Good to hear. The mission is B-ranked, mostly because of its location in Kusagakure. Konoha shinobi have gathered information on the Iwa shinobi and their strategies which have been stored in scrolls. Unfortunately, these cannot be transported any other way other than by foot and we can’t risk bringing back those on the frontlines to Konoha, so we need your squad to retrieve them.” Hiruzen held out a mission summary scroll towards Minato, who took it dutifully.

“B-ranked, you say?” Minato asked, pocketing the scroll.

“Yes,” Hiruzen replied. “The information gathered is not of the highest intelligence, but it would be helpful in the war effort. Expect some enemy shinobi, but it is unlikely that Iwa will follow you back into Fire Country for the scrolls.”

Kakashi stayed silent as Minato nodded. He remembered this assignment. Mission-wise, it was successful, but he remembered that he and Obito had gotten into a huge argument and didn’t speak for days afterwards. The details were fuzzy, but it had started when Obito overestimated his skillset and had gotten himself hurt. This time around, Kakashi was worried about his own abilities. A couple of practices with Gai and the wooden dummy hadn’t gotten him properly used to his younger body yet; it was hard to forget around twelve years of conditioning.

What was further concerning was how distracted he was. He wasn’t as observant and his mind tended to wander, getting caught in the past and thinking about the future. He had been blaming the younger mind for his lapses in concentration, but his younger self at _eight_ wouldn’t make the mistakes he had been committing in the few days he had been back in the past. Kakashi didn’t want to risk the success of the mission or the safety of his teammates because he suddenly got caught in his own mind.

“-In five days,” Hiruzen’s voice shook him out of his thoughts. “That will give you enough time to prepare for the assignment and to fully recover from any lingering injuries.” The Third shifted his eyes towards Kakashi briefly, showing that the latter comment was directed at him.

Feeling Minato’s eyes on him, Kakashi maintained his steady gaze at the desk in front of him. They had not been given five days to prepare the first time, Minato must have expressed some sort of concern to the Hokage. His stomach dropped slightly; this would be a new mission, he wouldn’t be able to rely on past knowledge to get by.

Hiruzen dismissed them and they regrouped outside the Hokage tower.

“Is everyone confident with the mission?” Minato asked as the gathered them into a circle of sorts. “The B-rank sounds mostly precautionary, but just be aware that war-related missions can easily jump up in rank.”

“We can handle it, sensei,” Obito puffed out his chest in reply, causing Minato to grin at him. Kakashi could understand his concern though. Obito and Rin were mid to low-level chūnin and he himself was only a high-ranked chūnin (that Minato knew of), and despite Minato being a high-ranked jōnin, the war brought an unpredictability factor to every mission. He had seen it first-hand.

“Actually, sensei…” Rin replied, bringing everyone’s attention to her. “I’d feel a lot better knowing that Kakashi’s eye was properly healed.”

“I was thinking the same thing, Rin.” Minato crossed his arms and looked at him expectantly.

Kakashi sighed in resignation, “It’s just scratched is all. It will be fine,” he deflected, but it was no use arguing at this point.

“Yes we know it’s all fine. But Rin is our team’s medical shinobi and I’m sure it hasn’t been easy for her to see you injured and be told that she can’t help.”

Was Minato guilt-tripping him? Well, it was working.

Sighing again, Kakashi turned to his kind teammate and lifted up the hitai-ate. His vision from his left eye was blurry and distorted due to lack of use, and he closed it immediately. Rin hummed thoughtfully but did not show any other outward reaction, simply closing the distance between them and lifting a glowing hand to the affected area. He did not want her this close to him. Keeping his other eye cast downwards, he thought of his students to keep his mind occupied and away from the image of a dying young Obito offering him his eye. He thought of how different Sasuke and Naruto would be if their respective families had not been killed. Would they still be his students?

“All done,” Rin smiled at him, her wide eyes creasing at the corners. Minato was right, she was relieved that she could finally help him.

“Thanks,” he replied quietly, adjusting his headband into a more comfortable position. He could no longer feel the scratches around his eye and his vision was perfectly clear; she had done a good job (which was to be expected). Obito was watching him with a strange expression.

“Did one of your dogs try and eat your eye or something?”

Kakashi rolled his eyes and Rin admonished the Uchiha, who quickly tried to defend himself to the girl.

“I think I’ll go home and reheat the dango,” Kakashi said to Minato, who was clearly pleased that his student had gotten his eye looked at. “Thanks for saving me some,” he added, knowing Minato was the sentimental sort.

“You’re welcome, Kakashi,” Minato smiled happily and placed his hand on his silver hair. “Just make sure you eat it.”

He huffed in frustration despite himself, causing Minato to ruffle his hair good-naturedly.

Waving goodbye to his teammates, he could hear Obito ask Minato if he could answer a couple more questions about the jutsu he had been practicing. He wasn’t sure he’d seen Obito at this age put so much effort into training, it was refreshing (if not a little disturbing).

Walking back towards his home, his stomach growled suddenly and he grimaced. Perhaps Minato’s annoying obsession with his diet wasn’t without merit, his appetite had been severely lacking in the past few days and perhaps it was catching up to him now. He looked back to the Hokage tower which was now over one hundred meters away, his teammates had dispersed and he could only spot Rin conversing with a grocer at one of the nearby stalls.

He felt terrible every time he saw her. A weight had lifted off his shoulders when he had paid his respects to his father, and he felt that the only way the guilt would stop gnawing at him would be to prevent her early death. He knew the actual action of her dying was not his fault, she had thrown herself in front of his raikiri, but they should not have been in such a helpless position in the first place. 

He broke his gaze and continued walking, fiddling with the box still in his hands. There was so much for him to do, so many people to save. The thought made him exhausted. He needed to plan, to devise a strategy. He wasn't going to save anybody if he kept on getting caught in his own head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone for the comments, kudos, subscriptions and bookmarks- you all make my day. 
> 
> A couple of notes:  
> \- White chrysanthemums in Japanese culture represent truth and/or grief. Bluebells represent gratitude, which I thought would be a nice touch for Gai to his father  
> \- I did some research on the 3rd shinobi war, and for those who are not aware or can't be bothered finding out for themselves (I can relate), a lot of the fighting between Iwa and Konoha occurred in and around Kusagakure (Village Hidden in the Grass).
> 
> I wanted this chapter to be a little longer, but decided to hold a scene (an important one story-wise) for the next chapter since it was a little too different in tone.
> 
> Also, it's been about 5 or 6 years since I've written any stories or anything fiction (and even then I don't want to count my early teens work it was so shit) so I'm a little rusty. If anyone has constructive criticism or ways I can improve please let me know.


	6. A Good Boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sooo sorry for the longer wait for the update, uni exams killed me and I've only just recovered. To compensate this is my longest chapter yet.

Uchiha Obito was in deep thought. Contrary to popular belief, that being the opinion his of clan and silver-haired teammate, he was not a complete idiot. Yes, he took a little longer than others with both general learning and training (including his goddamn sharingan that just wouldn’t appear), but he wasn’t _blind_.

There was something seriously weird going on with Kakashi.

At first, when Minato-sensei had asked them to _support_ Kakashi with whatever he was going through, he thought that just meant not needlessly calling him an idiot. It would be hard, but he could do that. When his sensei had given him the dango as an excuse for his information gathering (not stalking), he thought he might be able to find out the secret behind his weird behaviour. He was hoping for something embarrassing.

He did not expect to find his younger teammate at a _grave_ of all places.

Kakashi had dismissed him as always, but the entire situation had thrown him off massively. For one, his skin had crawled when Kakashi looked him in the eye. He was pretty sure that was not normal.

Now, watching Kakashi leave, he got a sudden urge to spill everything that had just happened to the rest of his team. But he held back, he didn’t want to worry Rin just yet if sensei thought it was nothing of concern.

“Sensei?” He turned to the jōnin, who was also watching Kakashi’s retreating form. “I was wondering if you could quickly help me with something about the phoenix flower jutsu, I think I’ve been getting the hand seals wrong.”

Minato raised an eyebrow at him, “Can it wait until tomorrow, Obito? I have some dinner plans and I don’t really want to be late.”

A part of Obito grumbled at that, he would have cancelled those plans for Kakashi. He wasn’t an idiot, he knew that Kakashi was his favourite, after all he had been his student for much longer than Obito and Rin had been.

“It will be so quick, I promise,” he said, hoping his voice was pleading enough without coming across as pathetic. He was going to have to take a long shower later; looking out for Kakashi was making him feel _gross_.

“Alright,” Minato sighed, “We’ll see you tomorrow, Rin. Come on Obito, let’s get off the street.”

Waving goodbye to Rin, who smiled cheerfully at the two of them causing Obito to blush furiously, he followed after his sensei as he lead them to a more secluded area. The sun was low now and created shadows below the trees, and the heat was finally at a tolerable level but Obito still felt uncomfortable.

“Now, what sign is the one you’re having trouble with? You were doing fine this morning.”

Obito licked his lips in trepidation, “Well… it’s not about that, really. The jutsu is hard but I’m all good with the hand signs.”

“Oh?” Minato furrowed his brow in confusion.

“It’s… it’s about Kakashi,” Obito tried to subdue the tug of jealousy as Minato immediately became more alert. His sensei was really worried about Kakashi, of course he would react immediately to anything that concerned him.

“Did something happen earlier? Before the meeting with the Hokage?”

“Nothing _happened_ ,” Obito emphasized. And nothing did happen, it was all a feeling that he had gotten, and not one he could describe without sounding crazy. “It was more where I found him. He was at the cemetery.”

Minato’s eyebrows shot up into his hairline.

“The _cemetery_? Was he visiting a grave?”

Obito frowned, “I think so… I think he had flowers too, but I couldn’t see very well. He wasn’t happy when he saw me there, he thought I was spying on him- which I wasn’t!”

Crossing his arms, Minato stared up at the trees in thought. “Perhaps that’s why he has been acting so strange… he must have lost someone close to him.”

Obito didn’t know about that, he was pretty sure Kakashi had zero friends. “Err… who?”

“I have no idea,” Minato admitted, “But why else would he visit a grave. Did he say anything to you about it at all?”

“Not really, he was mostly just annoyed at me. I didn’t know what to say either though, I totally did not expect him to be there. It was a complete accident that I was there anyways, I might have been… a little lost… but he just surprised me, you know?” He knew he was rambling, but he couldn’t help it. How could he explain the strange vibes he was getting from his teammate all day? “And he was acting so strange, there was this _weird_ feeling…” he trailed off and Minato smiled at him kindly.

“Well cemeteries are not the most pleasant of places for some people, Obito.”

“It wasn’t the cemetery, it was _Kakashi_ ,” he huffed. Why couldn’t anyone else see it? “Are you one thousand per cent sure that it’s the real him? Like there’s definitely no chance that it’s someone else in disguise?”

“Definitely,” Minato said firmly. “Thank you for coming to me with this though, Obito. Kakashi will heal from his loss in time, and maybe then he will start acting like he normally does.” Obito was kind of freaked out that this relieved him slightly, but grumpy Kakashi was better than batshit crazy Kakashi. “And I promise you I will help you master that jutsu.”

Obito grinned up at the blond, “Yes! And I will finally be able to do something Itachi can’t do yet! Do you know how much it sucks having a four year old be better than you in everything,” he grumbled. “Shisui too… I hate prodigies.”

“Don’t worry about them,” Minato smiled at him and ruffled his hair. “If you work hard enough, you’ll get there. Some of the strongest ninja weren’t born talented, like Itachi, they had to work very hard for it. And I think that they make the best leaders because they remember what it was like when they weren’t winning every fight and nailing every test.”

“You really think so?” Obito stared up at his sensei, his heart lifting.

“Of course,” Minato grinned. “But you have to work hard, no short cuts.”

“I will!” He declared, his anxiety over Kakashi all but forgotten. “Sorry for making you late for your date, sensei, I’ll let you go now.”

“What-“ Minato spluttered, but Obito had already started running in the direction of the Uchiha Compound with a newfound sense of confidence.

“Thanks sensei!” he called out through his laughter. For all his well-known strength and power, Minato was incredibly easy to tease.

* * *

Once again, Kakashi could not sleep.

He had made it home with ease, re-heating the dango and embracing the comforting silence of his apartment. The stressful day had helped him doze off easily on the couch, his arm draping off the side and his body curled into a ball. He had woken an hour later and decided to move to his room as it would be irritating to have sore limbs before training the next day, but that was when the nightmares started.

Dying hadn’t been pleasant the first or second time, so Kakashi had been thankful that his memory of the second experience at the hands of Obito had been hazy at best so far. Unfortunately, this blissful ignorance had ended as soon as he fell into a light dream-state.

They had been fighting in the kamui dimension. Obito, who had once struggled with taijutsu the most, had the upper hand. Kakashi had underestimated the powerful combination of skill and pure rage. It was not a pleasant memory.

It had taken longer than Kakashi wanted to admit for him to realise there was a knife speared through his chest, it was only when he looked down that the white hot pain finally registered and he let out a strangled gasp. Perhaps it was the fact that he had been _stabbed_ by _Obito_ that caused the delayed reaction, his brain just didn’t want to believe what was happening. Shock and disbelief was soon replaced with resignation and defeat; it was over for him. The last thing he remembered before waking up in a desperate frenzy was the slow spinning of the sharingan as Obito stared down at him, his lips twitching as if starting to speak. To mock him? To blame him one last time for what happened to Rin? It did not matter. He was already gone. After killing him, did Obito go on to massacre the rest of the shinobi alliance? He would never know.

None of these thoughts were helpful for sleeping at this time of night.

Once again, Kakashi found himself staring up at the ceiling, a heavy weight of sadness pressing on his chest. He was back where the people who meant the most to him were still alive (although some were yet to be born), and yet he felt so… lonely. No one knew what was coming or what he’d seen, and he couldn’t _tell_ anyone in fear that things would change too much. If only someone had come back with him, even it was-

Kakashi jolted out of bed as if he’d been shocked. _Of course_ , he thought with mild giddiness, _of course!_ With newfound hope and energy, Kakashi quickly slipped on his basic civilian clothes, a dark set of pants and long sleeves, and scrambled to the centre of the room before pausing. _Maybe I should do this outside? I don’t really want blood on the carpet… fuck it, I’ll deal with it later_.

Taking a deep breath to steady his racing heart, Kakashi could not help the smile that pulled on his lips. Not everyone was left behind, he wasn’t completely alone.

Biting his thumb and completing the hand seals for the summoning jutsu, he almost gently placed his hand on the carpet and leaned forward in barely contained excitement. There was a pop and a puff of smoke, which soon cleared to reveal the bored gaze of a much younger Pakkun. Seconds passed as the two stared at each other, Kakashi in an eager anticipation bordering on mania and Pakkun in mild confusion.

“…Er,” Pakkun broke the silence. “Yes, Boss?”

Kakashi’s heart sank and he slumped forward. The adrenalin practically zapped from his system as the exhaustion re-entered his body. He had been _so sure_.

“Boss?” Pakkun repeated, his voice gruff despite the fact that he still looked like a puppy. “What’s going on? Why are we in your room?”

Kakashi sighed before looking up to meet Pakkun’s half-lidded eyes; he was just yet another familiar face. “It’s nothing, Pakkun. I just had an idea but I don’t think it will work out.”

The miniature pug blinked slowly at him, “An _idea_? You woke me up at this time for an idea? Maybe you should be saving these ideas for lunchtime, Boss, you look like hell.”

“I know,” Kakashi groaned and closed his eyes as his head throbbed; the hope of his ninken also being sent back in time must have been influenced by sleep-deprived delirium. “I just haven’t been able to sleep the last couple of nights.”

“How come?” Pakkun asked, the soft sound of his paws pattering on the carpet as he moved closer to the young shinobi.

Kakashi stared down at the dog and something in his mind just clicked. Just because Pakkun did not come back with him didn’t mean that he couldn’t know what had happened, nothing would change by telling his ninken. Hope swelled again in his chest but Kakashi quickly squashed it, he did not want to crash again.

“Well… it’s a long story and it’s kind of unbelievable,” Kakashi began, to which Pakkun simply gave him his best deadpan stare. “Fine… I’m actually thirty years old, I woke up in this body a couple of days ago and I’m freaking out- which is why I can’t sleep by the way-”

Pakkun maintained his stare, “But you’re not thirty. You’re twelve.”

“No, this body is twelve, but my _mind_ is thirty. I’m from eighteen years in the future, where I am a thirty year old shinobi. I... died and woke up in the past where I’m twelve.” Kakashi paused again, “And before you say it, I’m not crazy.”

Pakkun’s bored gaze had morphed into one of mild concern, “Well I’m pretty sure that’s not possible. Maybe it was just a really vivid dream.”

“Obito killed me-“

“Definitely a dream,” Pakkun noted.

“-And then I just woke up here. I have no idea why or how. Come on, Pakkun, you’ve got to believe me,” Kakashi said, his wavering voice betraying his growing desperation. The pug eyed him before sighing and mumbling something incoherent under his breath.

“Okay,” he began, and despite the fact that Kakashi knew he was just humouring him for now, he was thankful. “Why did… _Obito_ kill you?”

That one was easy, “He’s crazy. Well… not right now, but he goes crazy. I’m still not completely sure of the reasoning behind it all, but I do know it began when Rin died.”

“Right,” Pakkun nodded, “He’s an Uchiha. They basically have a predisposition for losing their minds. Obito always seemed like the exception though, being a complete idiot and all.”

“I know it seems unlikely, but it’s true,” Kakashi said, absently rubbing his left eye. “Oh, and I get his sharingan-“

“You _stole_ his sharingan?” Pakkun said disbelievingly. “Maybe that’s why he killed you, Boss.”

“He gave it to me on a mission, we all thought he died…” Kakashi looked out his window tiredly, the moon was still shining brightly but he had a feeling it was going to start getting light soon. He looked back at Pakkun and shrugged, “He thought he was going to die too. And I spent the next fifteen years or so paying respect to a man while he was going around murdering people.”

Pakkun moved to rest his face on his paws, clearly thinking hard about what Kakashi was saying. “You said before that Rin died… that can’t have been the only reason he lost it.”

“Well, Obito is obsessed with her. But you’re right, he was also being influenced by Uchiha Madara.”

Pakkun shook his head in confusion, “Madara? I know that name… isn’t he long dead, killed by the First Hokage or something?”

“Apparently not,” Kakashi said mildly, before a thought struck him. “Maybe I should kill Madara, that would solve a lot of problems. He’s probably very well hidden though, since everyone thought he was dead for decades. Although… that means that no one was looking for him, pretty easy to hide when no one knows you’re hiding,” Kakashi made eye contact with a disturbed looking Pakkun. “What do you think?”

“…I think you should get some sleep, Boss.”

Kakashi sighed and leaned back against his bed, “I can’t sleep, Pakkun, that’s the problem. There are so many bad things that are going to happen, and I don’t know what to do to stop them. How can I sleep knowing that sensei and Rin and going to die within a couple of years? Or that the entire Uchiha clan will be wiped out in a decade’s time?”

Pakkun shuffled closer and rested his head against Kakashi’s leg, silently encouraging the silver-haired shinobi to scratch behind his ears. Kakashi obliged.

“You’re putting too much pressure on yourself, boy,” Pakkun mumbled. “I can tell you think that anything that happens from here on will be your fault, but that’s not true, just because you know what _might_ happen doesn’t mean you can control what _will_ happen. Sometimes things are just meant to be, nothing you can do about it.”

“Things already feel different though,” Kakashi said, gazing up at the ceiling and patting Pakkun absently. “It’s not the same as last time.”

“Maybe that’s because you’re looking at things as an adult and not as a child,” the ninken suggested, causing Kakashi to frown down at him. “Or maybe things are changing, who knows,” he amended quickly. “Have you done anything stupid yet?”

Smiling slightly, Kakashi gave Pakkun an affectionate scratch on his stomach, “You believe me.”

“I do,” Pakkun grumbled, “Against all logic, too. Have you told anyone else?”

“No, not yet. Should I?”

“No,” Pakkun said firmly. “Just because I believe you doesn’t mean that you don’t sound crazy. Or look crazy, for that matter. Get some sleep, Boss.”

“There’s no point, training is in a couple of hours anyway,” Pakkun’s half-lidded stare was starting to unnerve him, though he was adorable. “Okay, I _promise_ I will try to sleep after training. I’ve slept for seven hours during the day before, I can do it again.”

“Wow, congrats.” Pakkun said monotonously, and Kakashi rolled his eyes. “What will you do in the meantime?”

“I dunno… you want to hear more about the future?”

“Not really,” Pakkun replied, closing his eyes, “Your future kind of sucks.”

Kakashi couldn’t argue with that, “You don’t even want to hear about the time I was Hokage? Or about the first time I died?” Patting Pakkun was starting to feel very therapeutic, and Kakashi leant his head back more comfortably against the bed.

“What kind of an idiot would make you Hokage? And what do you mean the _first_ time you died, are you immortal or something?”

“Maybe I am,” Kakashi mumbled, closing his eyes. “Hey, what made you believe me?”

He could feel Pakkun let out a puff of air through his nose, “I don’t know if you know this, but you did not talk or act like this about a week ago. You were a snivelly prat, and now you’re a more mature, sadder prat. Unless there is some sort of personality changing jutsu out there, I knew there had to be something going on. Plus, you never talked this much.”

“Fair. You’re the same, though. Were you born old?”

Pakkun merely grumbled in reply and Kakashi could feel his breathing start to slow, the circular rubbing he had been doing on Pakkun’s back became more and more lethargic as he felt himself beginning to doze off despite his upright position. Eventually, sleep finally took him as Pakkun curled up closer to his leg.

When Kakashi woke up, his head was leaning against his bed, his hand was resting on Pakkun’s back, and sunlight was beaming through the window.

“Shit,” Kakashi muttered, disturbing Pakkun as he frantically got up to change into his training wear. “ _Shit_.”

“You never used to swear either,” Pakkun yawned, doing the most half-assed stretch Kakashi had ever seen.

“Yeah and I also never used to sleep in,” Kakashi replied, quickly pulling on his arm guards. “I can’t believe sensei didn’t come and get me.”

“Maybe he’s also noticed how weird you are, it’s hard to miss.”

“Yeah, he’s noticed,” Kakashi muttered, reaching for his gloves. “Can you wait here until I get back? We need to go over our plan for what we’re going to do next.”

Pakkun looked less than enthused by this notion, “I’m a summons, Boss, I can’t do shit. Unless you want me to track somebody, I can’t help you,” noticing Kakashi’s deflated look he added, “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t want to help me prevent the kyūbi from attacking the village?” he asked, but he knew that Pakkun was right. His Pakkun might have been able to help him devise strategies, but this one was barely through his puppy years (even though he acted ancient) and had only a fraction of the experience.

“I’m afraid that’s above my skillset,” Pakkun said apologetically. “I can help you sleep though, and you can tell me your plans and I’ll tell you how stupid they are. Besides, I should probably go tell the others that you’re crazy- I mean, from the future.”

Kakashi gave the ninken a half-hearted glare, “Very funny.” Making his way towards the window, Kakashi paused as he noticed Pakkun staring at him, “…What?”

“You’re not going to eat something before you train? Old you always did.”

“I’ll eat when I get back,” Kakashi rolled his eyes. First Minato and now Pakkun.

The ninken eyed him with what looked like concern, “Living on low food, low sleep and low sanity isn’t good for you, Boss.”

_Yes, Mum_ , Kakashi thought, but gave Pakkun a reassuring smile nonetheless. “I’ll have a big lunch.”

“Summon me when you get back so I can have some of that lunch,” Pakkun gave him what could only be described as a smug look before vanishing in a puff of smoke. Kakashi sighed, swinging out the window and moving into a jog towards the training grounds. It was only now that he could feel the weight lifted off his shoulders, it had only been a few days in the past and he had already started feeling the cracks forming in his resolve. Just having someone to talk to, even though Pakkun could do little else than just listen, was a massive relief.

Some of that relief dissipated though when he saw how his teammates were looking at him as he arrived at the training ground. Something had changed. Rin in particular was looking at him with wide eyes. Maybe it was just because he was late _again_ , and very late by the looks of things.

“Kakashi!” Minato called out, smiling kindly as he walked towards him. “We weren’t sure whether you were going to make it today. Feel free to go or just do what you want; we won’t be training for too much longer.”

_What?_ Kakashi blinked in confusion.

“What?” he voiced his thoughts, the slightly louder tone appearing to take Minato off-guard. “Why didn’t you come and get me?”

“We thought you needed the rest,” Minato said slowly. “You know, for your eye and all.”

_My eye?!_ Kakashi could not help but internally fume, this was _so clearly_ not about his eye.

“We have a _mission_ ,” Kakashi bit out through gritted teeth, “That we are supposed to prepare for. How can I be prepared when I am left out of training?” How was he going to prevent anyone from dying if Minato kept babying him like this?

Minato didn’t look like he was appreciating his mini-tantrum. Kakashi expected Obito to be highly amused but when he spotted the boy out the corner of his eye, he was frowning.

“Kakashi,” Minato said firmly, his eyes pleading for Kakashi to understand. “Part of being prepared for missions is being properly rested and healthy, something that I, as your sensei, saw that you clearly needed. I’m sorry that you’re mad at me, but that’s too bad. I will not take sleep-deprived shinobi into a war zone; that is asking for someone to be killed.”

Kakashi stared silently at the ground, the unfamiliar feeling of embarrassment beginning to form in his gut. Of course, Minato was right. And he was acting like a goddamn child.

Sensing that Kakashi was done talking, Minato turned to his other two students, “This applies to you guys too, make sure that you are eating and sleeping right. It might sound silly, but that tiny extra millisecond of reaction time and clearer thinking could be the difference between life and death, for you or your teammates.”

_I am such an idiot_ , Kakashi cringed as he watched Obito and Rin nod enthusiastically. The sleeping was not completely his fault, and it looked like Pakkun being there was going to help, but the eating was totally on him.

“Sorry, sensei,” he said quietly, and Minato turned around in surprise.

“Oh…” Minato began hesitantly, looking like he wasn’t sure how to continue. “That’s okay Kakashi, we know you’re… we made sure that you didn’t miss anything tactical. It’s just mostly a continuation of what we were doing yesterday.”

Kakashi raised an eyebrow at the way Minato stumbled over his words when he had perfectly delivered a smack-down to him not moments ago, but decided to let it go. Minato was weird like that sometimes.

“Okay… would you like me to help Rin again with her taijutsu?” Kakashi asked, causing Rin to brighten up noticeably.

“No I think we’re about done for today,” Minato replied and Rin wilted, “But I’m happy to do some sparring with you before lunch. Obito, Rin, you guys can go if you’d like.”

Obito looked delighted at the prospect of hanging out with Rin, but she had other ideas. “Oh, can we watch? I have to warm down anyway. Only if you don’t mind, Obito, then we can have lunch all together since Kakashi missed out yesterday.”

“Oh, that’s fine,” Obito muttered, glaring at Kakashi like it was his fault that Rin was a nice person. It didn’t matter though, he had other commitments.

“Thanks Rin, but I can’t make it anyway,” Kakashi said, “I already promised someone that I would have lunch with them. You guys go ahead.”

The three of them stared at him in a mixture of surprise and shock, and Obito was the first to break the silence.

“ _What!_ Who- you don’t even have any friends!”

_Well that’s just mean_ , Kakashi felt like pouting. It made his answer even sadder though. Obito and Rin were staring at him with such intrigue that was so eerily similar to Naruto and Sakura back when they were actually impressed with things that he did, that Kakashi got a sudden rush of nostalgic mischief.

“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t. It’s not really any of your business who I see,” he shrugged nonchalantly. “I haven’t warmed up much sensei, but I should be ready to spar now.”

It took all of his self-control to maintain his cool exterior as Rin audibly gasped and Obito staggered like he’d been hit. Minato silently watched the scene with visible amusement.

“What the _hell_ does that mean?” Obito spluttered and Kakashi gave him a deadpan look that only seemed to confuse him more.

Grabbing Obito’s arm, Rin began to drag him away, “We’ll let you train, enjoy your lunch, Kakashi!”

Kakashi watched them go, a smile tugging at his lips. They were so perfectly reminiscent of Naruto and Sakura, although if he were being picky, Sakura was slightly more nosy than Rin. He was sure his student would have pressed a little further before dragging Naruto away.

“So who’s the lunch with?” Minato smiled at him as turned back to face the blond.

Kakashi paused, “…Pakkun.”

Minato let out a hearty laugh at this, causing Kakashi to smile again in response. “Obito is going to be so disappointed by that answer,” he shook his head at his student. “You seem much better today, Kakashi, I’m glad. And… I don’t want you to ever feel like you’re isolated from this team, or that you have to keep secrets just for the sake of it. Sometimes it’s best to just talk about things, even when it hurts.”

Kakashi eyed Minato in confusion, the smile fading from his face. What was he talking about, how much did he know or think he knew?

Sighing, Minato moved into a defensive stance, “Don’t worry about it. You ready?”

Kakashi nodded and mirrored his movement, realising quickly that sparring with Minato was going to be a lot different than sparring with Gai. For one, Minato knew his fighting style, or at least what it _should_ be. It would be difficult to hide anything from someone who had been training with him for year, and particularly when that someone was _concerned_. 

"Ready," he breathed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi summarised right now: low on food, low on sleep, low on sanity, high on sass. 
> 
> I can't determine exactly when the next chapter will come out, I'm going overseas soon so I will either have the next chapter up within two weeks (before I go) or in a month or more (after I come back). I make no promises but I will be trying for two weeks.
> 
> Also, I love everyone leaving comments, kudos and bookmarks. It makes my day. Hope you all enjoyed the well overdue chapter.


	7. A New Idea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, I will have the main notes and explanation at the end of the chapter, but I just wanted to apologise for the really long wait. Here is a summary for the story so far for those who have been waiting for an update but due to my incompetence have likely forgotten parts of what's happened. 
> 
> Kakashi is back in the past after dying at Obito's hand. Struggling with keeping up the act of a twelve year old, and under the watchful eye of Minato, Kakashi is unsure how to deal with the issue of Obito's later betrayal. He does, however, have someone who knows the truth: Pakkun. So far Kakashi has:  
> \- Sparred with Gai (finding short limbs a difficulty)  
> \- Visited his father's grave  
> \- Concerned everyone around him  
> \- Told Pakkun the truth  
> \- Been given a mission to be undertaken in the next few days. 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy the new chapter.

Kakashi, leaning further into a defensive pose, eyed the twinkle in Minato’s eyes with mild regret. He had come to realise later in life that his sensei, the sentimental fool, had viewed their sparring sessions as a form of ‘bonding’. Just seeing how happy the blond was now to spend time with him caused a twinge of sadness to curl in his gut. He didn’t have long to dwell on this feeling though as Minato sprung forward.

With barely enough time to curse his short arms, Kakashi quickly brought a kunai up to his chest to block the attack, automatically swinging a kick at Minato’s knees before flipping over him.

_Probably best to stick with taijutsu with this one_ , Kakashi thought grimly as he evaded numerous attacks, _No idea what techniques I’m supposed to have right now and sensei isn’t giving me any time to plan ahead._

Minato was _fast_. Which he already knew of course, but it was easy to forget just how fast he really was (even though Kakashi knew he still wasn’t going all out). But while Minato thought he knew his student’s fighting style and weaknesses, Kakashi _actually_ knew his sensei’s.

_Now._ Kakashi moved from his defensive blocking into a quick counter-attack, using his kunai to keep Minato’s hands occupied as he delivered a swift chakra fuelled kick to his stomach. Minato let out light ‘oof’ sound, both from surprise and the impact, as he was forced back a couple of meters. Sensing an opportunity to gain the upper hand, Kakashi charged forwards and tried a string of swipes and kicks which Minato blocked with what appeared to be relative ease.

Kakashi was beginning to get frustrated. He should be better than this. He had been worried before that Minato would notice a change in fighting style, but that concern was so far from his mind as his entire focus had moved to _proving_ (mostly to himself) that he was better than before. The logical part of his mind was telling him that of course he was not as strong right now as his adult self; he did not have the muscle tone, stamina, or the cohesion between body and mind. Or the sharingan. But panic was taking over as how was he going to be able to _save_ Minato and Rin and _everyone_ if he was a useless child?

His attacks were becoming more and more erratic, the fluidity of his movement and fighting form was beginning to fade. And, to no one’s surprise, this was not improving his efforts against Minato. The lack of concentration had also meant that a few of his attacks had come up short, and Kakashi tried to ignore the mild bewilderment that was growing on his sensei’s face.

The spar went on for a few more minutes, _Out of pity_ , Kakashi thought bitterly, before Minato finally utilised the upper hand he had gained and grabbed Kakashi’s wrist as he came up short in another strike. Minato twisted his wrist and dumped him into the ground in one swift motion, leaving Kakashi with little opportunity to do anything but nod his head in defeat. How embarrassing.

“You’ve really improved, Kakashi,” Minato said cheerfully, helping him to his feet. “I’m impressed.”

Kakashi just stared at him moodily, “You don’t have to be nice. I was terrible.”

“What?” the blond let out a short laugh. “There’s a massive improvement in speed and agility. Yes, you lost it a little towards the end there, but I bet that was more mental than physical.” Minato laid an uncertain hand on his shoulder, “You should be proud of yourself Kakashi, all of your hard work is paying off. I can see you making jōnin soon.”

His instincts were telling him to shrug off the hand, but he just couldn’t bring himself to. It clearly meant a lot to Minato. _It means a lot to you too_ , a voice in his head whispered.

“Okay,” he said quietly. When Minato didn’t move his hand after a few long seconds, Kakashi looked up at him.

Minato was frowning, “Where has all your confidence gone, Kakashi?”

“…My confidence?” Kakashi repeated, confused.

“Yes. Your confidence,” Minato replied, grudgingly pulling his hand back from his student’s shoulder. “It’s one thing to be hard on yourself, but it’s another to not even recognise your own improvement. This is so unlike you.”

A beat of silence passed and Kakashi was grateful that Rin and Obito had not stayed to watch the spar, as he didn’t want extra eyes watching him squirm under his sensei’s questioning gaze. Minato hadn’t even brought up yet the fact that many of his hits hadn’t even reached their target, let alone land.

“I was just… expecting to be better.” The best lies were based around the truth.

“Well, you are better,” Minato smiled, but Kakashi could tell by the way it didn’t quite reach his eyes that he was not entirely convinced. Or maybe he was building up to asking him what the hell half of that spar was. “Kakashi…” Minato began again, suddenly exuding awkwardness.

_Oh, here we go_ , Kakashi cringed internally. He had no idea how he was going to reasonably explain why his last few punches were about a foot off. Maybe Obito’s demon possession idea?

“…Everyone deals with grief differently,” Kakashi felt his mind stutter for a second. _Grief?_ “But the lack of eating and sleeping, and now being unreasonably hard on yourself is not good. I don’t want to pry into your personal life, but I am concerned.”

Kakashi simply stared at his sensei with wide eyes. _What is he… Grief? What am I grieving?_ Kakashi paused mid-thought, _Well… a lot actually._

Appearing to take his shocked silence as a sign that his student was not taking his concern well, Minato quickly backtracked. “Obviously it’s only been a few days, I think, but I just didn’t want to have to see you get worse or have you think you had to deal with it on your own.”

“…Oh,” Kakashi responded, still confused. Minato did not add anything further, and Kakashi realised that he was waiting for him to continue talking. For him to say something that would reassure him. “I’m okay, sensei… experiencing loss is a part of being a shinobi.”

This did not appear to be the right thing to say. Minato’s face dropped and he shook his head slightly, eyes downcast. “That may be so, Kakashi,” he said quietly. “But we are still human, we’re not just mindless machines.”

This was not going how Kakashi had expected, when or how did they even get to this topic? Something told him however that this was not out of the blue; Minato had been thinking about this for a while. Despite this assumption, his sensei’s body language practically screamed awkwardness.

“…Of course, sensei,” Kakashi replied, trying to stop himself from shuffling his feet awkwardly. “I should probably go get some lunch now… don’t want to keep Pakkun waiting too long…” he trailed off, ignoring the fact that Pakkun was likely expecting him to keep him waiting.

Minato sent him a lopsided smile, “Of course, er… tell him I said hello,” he finished lamely. Kakashi nodded and shunshined away, shaking his head at his sensei’s strange behaviour once he had reached the edge of the village buildings. Minato had always been caring and sensitive towards others, which was one of the reasons he would have made a great long term Hokage, but this time Kakashi was dumbfounded as to what he was talking about. Grief? Perhaps the blond subconsciously knew that he was different, and his mind filled in the blanks and came up with grief. It was not too far off, if Kakashi was being honest with himself.

Making his way aimlessly through the village, Kakashi took more time to take in his surroundings. He had been previously thinking that the attack from Pein had changed things drastically, but he had forgotten that the attack by the kyūbi (and therefore Obito) had levelled parts of the village. There were buildings here and there that had stood the test of both events, but much of the scenery was vastly different. _So much shit to come_ , Kakashi thought, the feeling of dread beginning to curl in his gut. He had a lot of work to do.

“-A couple of years, and I expect him to graduate not long after,” Kakashi paused as he caught the edge of a conversation, realising now how close he was to Konoha’s Military Police building. “He is exceptionally talented, I believe he has the potential to even surpass Uchiha M-“ his eavesdropping was abruptly cut short as possibly the grumpiest face he’d ever seen came into view. “Hatake,” Uchiha Fugaku eyed him warily, but not with the disgust and barely concealed rage that he remembered so vividly.

As an overwhelming urge to scratch his left eye came over him, Kakashi remembered that he did not have the sharingan and therefore Uchiha Fugaku did not hate him with every fibre of his being.

“Lord Uchiha,” Kakashi bowed slightly, wracking his brain to remember if he had ever spoken to the Uchiha Clan Head before the incident with Obito. He was coming up blank, meaning that Fugaku’s new first impression of him was that he was an eavesdropper.

Fugaku maintained his unnerving stare, the frown lines etched into his face deepening as Kakashi held eye contact. To some, it would have seemed like the older Uchiha was unnecessarily attempting to intimidate the chūnin. But Kakashi knew better; Fugaku had almost made a huge mistake and was determining whether Kakashi, albeit with the appearance of a twelve year old, had noticed.

And he had noticed. Fugaku was clearly talking about his prodigious son and had almost, in public, compared him to Uchiha Madara. It was honestly a fair comparison, but an Uchiha saying Madara’s name (or almost saying it, in this case) in public was still, even at this point in time, seen as a sign of rebellion. Even if it was just the Clan Head bragging about how powerful his kid was.

Making his appearance and posture as disarming as possible, Kakashi bowed deeper this time, “My deepest apologies for interrupting your conversation, Lord Uchiha. I was distracted and you caught me off guard.”

Fugaku let his silence linger for a second more before responding, “Perhaps you should be training harder so you will not be distracted by listening to private conversations, or simply just be better at it.”

That was fair. By his marginally more relaxed face, Kakashi deducted that the older Uchiha had dismissed the thought that he was gathering intelligence, or even knew what name he was going to say.

Kakashi nodded politely before continuing on his way, trying to ignore the feeling of a dark pair of eyes piercing into the back of his head. Maybe Fugaku was not completely convinced of his feigned innocence. 

He spotted a barbeque stand and his thoughts quickly returned back to Pakkun; the pug had likely told his other ninken what Kakashi had told him, although with significantly more monotone. The thought of again being able to be completely honest about his situation to someone gave him a spark of energy, and he ordered as quickly as he could and shunshined back to his apartment. He paused for a second and debated whether to summon the entire pack, but the aroma coming from the multiple bags in his arms was causing his stomach to concave, and he knew with the whole pack here he would not get enough food to satisfy his hunger. Another time.

Once again using the middle of his bedroom to summon his ninken (his younger self would be horrified), Kakashi triumphantly held up a steaming box of barbeque as Pakkun appeared in a cloud of smoke.

“…Well I can’t say I wasn’t expecting you to be back to your normal self the next time I saw you, Boss,” the pug said, tilting his head lazily. Kakashi deflated a little bit at that, opening the box containing chicken and reaching for the chopsticks inside. “Where are the vegetables? Are you not a huge health freak in the future?”

Kakashi sent a glare towards Pakkun and pulled his mask down, “If you’re going to be mean, you will get no barbeque,” he said and paused mid-bite. “And I do eat vegetables, this was for your benefit.”

“Sure…” Pakkun muttered, but made his way over to the silver haired shinobi all the same.

The two ate in comfortable silence, and Kakashi could feel his stomach thanking him for finally giving it something to eat, although barbeque may not have been the best option for the first meal in a couple of days.

“So,” he started, swallowing the piece of beef he had been chewing. “I’ve been thinking. I need to make a few changes.”

Pakkun looked up at him in mild interest, “To what, the future?”

“That makes it sound a bit dramatic, but yes. First of all, I need to go and find Tenzō. I’ve got no idea where to start, but I need to find him before he gets recruited by ROOT.”

“Okay…” Pakkun said slowly, “Who’s Tenzō?”

“A friend.”

“You have friends?”

Kakashi rolled his eyes, _How predictable_. “Very funny. Tenzō is currently or already has been experimented on by Orochimaru; remember him, the snake guy? I don’t want him then to be recruited by Danzō, the bad guy with the eye patch on the Council.”

Pakkun maintained his half-lidded stare, “…I don’t think I know Danzō.”

“That’s probably for the best, he’s had a hand in a lot of the bad shit that happened in Konoha,” Kakashi said, taking another bite of the beef. To be fair to Danzō, he thought he was doing what was best for Konoha (most of the time), he was just a little too power hungry to make the right decision. “ROOT is a particularly degrading program, Tenzō would be much better off not experiencing both that _and_ being tortured by Orochimaru.”

“As fun as it is hearing you talk non-stop,” Pakkun yawned, “I think you’re just trying to avoid one particular topic.”

Kakashi simply raised an eyebrow in response.

“Obito.” Pakkun finished, and Kakashi closed his eyes and sighed. “What are you going to do about your insane teammate?”

“He’s not insane yet, so I can’t really do anything about it,” Kakashi replied, pinching the bridge of his nose as he felt a headache coming on. “I can’t exactly go and kill him when he hasn’t done anything wrong, I’d be locked up for good and Minato would never speak to me again.”

“…I never said anything about killing him,” the pug eyed him warily. “I was thinking maybe stopping whatever thing made him crazy in the first place from happening. What the hell is going on in your brain, Boss?”

Kakashi felt suddenly defensive under his ninken’s disapproving stare, “You didn’t see what happened to him, he’d totally lost it-“

“So, I don’t know, maybe _stop_ him from losing it?”

“It’s not that easy,” Kakashi hissed, feeling the frustration start to bubble inside. “What if that is Obito, who he is meant to be, and I stop him from being crushed under a boulder only for some other unforeseen event to occur and he turns crazy then. And besides, he’s an Uchiha; as you said they basically have a predisposition for insanity.”

Pakkun still looked unamused, “Well… they can’t all be crazy.”

“That is not what you said this morning. They are- well,” he paused and tilted his head. “I suppose Itachi never went insane, he just pretended to.” And it was a very convincing act, it was only after his death that anyone found out the truth.

“Can you stop just saying names when I have no idea who these people are,” Pakkun grumbled, moving back to devouring the meat in front of him.

“Sorry,” Kakashi replied, wincing slightly. He kept forgetting that this wasn’t the Pakkun he was used to, and this younger version did not share very many experiences with him at all. “Itachi is only four at the moment I think, but he’s already very intelligent and talented. In my future he is ordered to kill the entire Uchiha clan by the Council lead by Danzō, the bad guy with the eye patch, but under the expectation that he will become a missing nin.”

Pakkun listened intently to the explanation, his mouth frozen mid-chew. “Huh. That’s pretty heavy… so everyone thought he had just suddenly snapped or something? I can’t imagine a four year old killing an entire clan.”

“What? Oh, no it was much later, he was twelve or thirteen I think,” following Pakkun’s example, he started again on the beef he was eating before. Anything Obito related made him lose his appetite. “But yeah, we all thought he was some evil kid, he was on my ANBU squad too so I always felt like I should have noticed something was off.”

“You think you’ll try and stop all that from happening?” Pakkun asked, and Kakashi could sense the sympathy coming from his ninken. Pakkun was beginning to understand now just how much he was up against.

“I’ll try,” he sighed, absently twirling the chopsticks between his fingers. “The massacre is extremely complicated though, its decades of build-up leading to that night. I’m not sure there is too much I can do about it. The only thing on my side is I’ve got plenty of time to think about it before it happens.”

Pakkun mumbled a ‘poor kid’ before stretching his legs and resting his face on his paws.

The pair sat in silence once more, and it was only then that Kakashi felt a sudden overwhelming urge to do something. To change something. All this talk of the unfairness of Itachi’s life was providing him with one of the most powerful sources of energy: _purpose_.

Kakashi rose up from the floor so suddenly that Pakkun jumped a little in surprise and proceeded to glare up at the shinobi.

“What are you doing?” the ninken asked, eyeing Kakashi with cautious interest.

“I’m going to go see Itachi,” Kakashi responded determinedly, and then gestured to the half-eaten beef. “You can finish that if you want.”

“Er... didn’t you say he was two years old or something?”

“No, he’s four,” Kakashi corrected and Pakkun gave him a flat look.

“My mistake,” Pakkun replied, rolling his eyes. Kakashi knew what his ninken was getting at, but chose to ignore him anyway. He never knew Itachi when he was this young, although he knew _of_ him, but Kakashi guessed the kid probably already acted like a thirty year old. “And what do you plan to achieve by seeing him anyway?”

That, Kakashi couldn’t answer. He just felt like it was important to see the young Uchiha heir, and a Pakkun who hadn’t seen what he’d experienced in the future wouldn’t truly understand why he needed to do this. Kakashi didn’t really understand either, and if he were being honest with himself, a small part of his sudden urge to see Itachi was just pure fascination and curiosity.

“So,” Kakashi said, ignoring Pakkun’s previous question. “I’m going to go to the Uchiha Compound, don’t destroy this place while I’m gone.”

Pakkun squinted up at him, “You’re just going to stroll into the Uchiha Compound? And demand to talk to a baby? I don’t think they’d let you do that.”

“Quit doing that, he’s four. And I’m sure I can just ask-“ Kakashi paused, remembering the way Fugaku looked at him earlier. It would look slightly dodgy to anyone considering what he had overheard, but to the Uchiha clan head, it would look like a downright conspiracy. “…Well, I’ll figure out a way.”

Simply raising a heavy eyebrow, Pakkun turned to the food Kakashi left him and let his silence speak as to how little faith he had in this idea.

Kakashi sighed. Sparing one last look at his ninken, he swept out of the bedroom window and landed silently on the overgrown grass outside. He had no actual plan, but he had confidence that something would come to him when he needed it.

The village was bustling with energy as the silver-haired shinobi wandered somewhat aimlessly through the main street, academy and non-shinobi school hours must have finished as there was a significant increase in children compared to the past few days. Kakashi found that he didn’t dislike the increase in noise and activity, finding it almost peaceful and relaxing somehow.

“Oi, Kakashi!” an uncomfortably familiar voice called out, and Kakashi felt his good mood slowly leaving him. “Thought you were having lunch or something? I hope Minato-sensei kicked your ass.”

Kakashi levelled a bored stare at Obito, debating whether to just shunshin away from irritating chūnin. Did he have no concept of time? It had been at least a couple of hours since training ended. Instead of making a grand escape, Kakashi just kept walking and was completely unsurprised when Obito decided to follow.

Realising that Kakashi wasn’t going to respond, the Uchiha kept talking, “Me and Rin got some sushi, it was great. Asuma was there,” Obito didn’t even try to hide his annoyance that this, “with some guy I don’t know, I think it starts with an ‘R’ or something, I can’t remember.”

Kakashi had a feeling that might have been Raidō, who he was sure Obito must have spoken to before as they were in the same academy year.

Tuning out the Obito babble, Kakashi felt an idea forming. Obito, who occasionally complained about how Itachi was just breezing through everything he had struggled with, would likely know how to find Itachi without having to first go through Fugaku. He could feel his blood beginning to boil at the thought of spending more time than necessary in Obito’s company, but this time it just couldn’t be helped.

Kakashi stopped and turned towards his older teammate, who he realised had actually stopped talking and was staring ahead moodily.

“Obito,” he said, capturing the Uchiha’s attention. “I need your help with something,” he added a twang of frustration to his voice in the hope that it not only piqued Obito’s interest, but made it sound like he was slightly desperate.

“Oh, er, with what?” Obito stared at him in surprise, sounding shocked but immediately attempting to hide it behind a poor act of indifference. “I doubt if I can though, I’m pretty busy.”

Kakashi resisted the strong urge to roll his eyes, “Right. Well, it’s about Uchiha Itachi-“ he paused as Obito’s expression of barely concealed interest dropped from his face and was replaced with one of disappointment.

“Oh, well then you should speak to Shisui then…” Obito trailed off, staring resolutely at the ground and kicking at a few stones.

Kakashi blinked a few times; he had not expected this reaction.

“No… um, I just need to know when Itachi trains at the Uchiha Compound,” _Make it sound cooler_ , “But I don’t want Fugaku to know about it.”

Obito looked up, confused. “Why don’t you want him knowing? What’s going on?”

“He doesn’t like me much at the moment,” Kakashi said. It was sort of true; Fugaku didn’t _like_ him, but he probably didn’t dislike him either. But it didn’t really matter, because Obito was interested again.

Seemingly sold on the idea of a small defiance against the clan head, Obito’s spirits visibly lifted. “Cool. Itachi trains with Lord Fugaku sometimes, but I’m pretty sure that he trains by himself in the afternoon. That’s what everybody raves about anyways.”

Kakashi nodded, understanding why there was a bit of resentment towards the topic of his younger fellow clansman. Obito had hated being shown up by Kakashi, but he imagined it must have been worse with a point of comparison being a four year old prodigy.

“Do you know where he trains?” Kakashi asked, and the added, “I just want to see what everyone is talking about.”

“Oh yeah, it’s always the same place,” Obito replied. “I can take you there.”

Wait, no. That wasn’t part of the plan.

“No that’s fine, you can just tell me. I can find it myself,” Kakashi pleaded internally that Obito would just tell him and leave, but he knew it wouldn’t happen. Kakashi was grateful that their conversation in the middle of the main street was largely being ignored by passers-by, as he suspected it would be a strange conversation to overhear.

“How would you find it if I told you anyway? You haven’t been to the Uchiha training grounds before,” Obito replied cheerfully, seemingly unaware that Kakashi was grinding his teeth in frustration.

“…Fine,” he bit out. Why was Obito being so difficult? Did this have something to do with the ‘grief’ Minato suggested he was suffering from? Or was he just determined to piss off Fugaku.

Adjusting his goggles, Obito looked away in thought. “Actually, I don’t think Itachi would be training today. I heard yesterday that there was some meeting or something going on today, Itachi will probably have to go. Poor bugger, those meeting are boring as hell,” Obito said, not sounding very sorry at all. “We’d have to go find him tomorrow.”

Kakashi suppressed a groan, this was all very much not what he had in mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who continues to leave comments and kudos, you are all so kind. If I'm being honest, I've actually had most of this chapter written for months now, I was just struggling to find the motivation to finish it after I was unable to upload it before I travelled overseas. I am so sorry for the long wait, I will definitely be uploading chapters much quicker now that my life is a little more in order.


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